parents

My FILs are attending ours in October and honestly many of us are immunocompromised. If for some reason they change their minds, I won't hold it against them. I want them there, I want everyone there, but what we're going through is so unknown, I just want everyone to be safe in their own way.

Also, your wedding is in February, honestly - I think you'll be fine by then...

They're not trying to take control of your wedding, they're in control of their health. You shouldn't make them feel guilty for making their health a priority. Many people aren't going to feel comfortable attending social events for a long time.

View Quoted Comment I was meaning to say control of my emotions. I almost cancel because they are not sure about attending.

View Quoted Comment I don't think they are trying to control you, your emotions, or your wedding. I think they are trying to keep themselves safe. Their healthy ulimately comes before your wedding. I have seen lots of articles where people have continued with large weddings and guests have gotten sick and some have even passed away. Unfortunately, I think you need to understand that some people may chose not to attend due to safety concerns. It doesn't mean they don't love or support you, it just means they want to stay healthy.

My wedding isn't until May, but I am definitely fearful of this. If by May, she still isn't comfortable traveling and attending a medium-sized event, we will cancel the wedding and elope and get married where she lives instead. Neither having my mom not attend nor putting her in a situation where she feels her health could be jeopardized are options for me. In no way do I feel like she is trying to control me or my wedding...she is trying to make informed, responsible decisions about her health and safety.

View Quoted Comment I was trying to say allowed then to take control of my emotions. I am Marrying my husband to be. I don't want to move my wedding date. So if my parents not able to make it I will continue to plan. I understand they are playing it safe. If they cab go to work and a mask for 8 up to 10 hours five days out of the week. They can sit a couple of hours throughout my wedding.

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It's so hard, it's just an impossible situation. I really hope for both of us, it won't even be a consideration by then!

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This, absolutely. I get being sad that a pandemic might keep your parents from attending your wedding. But their health IS more important than your wedding.

"i feel that my parents should be there with me and support me every step of the way". I caution you about framing this situation as they are "with you or against you." Being careful with their health does not mean they don't also support you.

It sucks right now but everyone’s got to make the best decision for themselves. I’m 8 months pregnant and my parents haven’t gotten to see me pregnant which I never imagined. They also might not get to meet the baby until there’s a vaccine. Everyone’s health is the most important thing in the world right now though. I let myself cry sometimes and then try to move forward and focus on what I can control.

My FH's dad and stepmom are unsure if they can come. They live in Seattle and although they already have their tickets booked, his stepmom is super nervous about traveling. It sucks and I know if they don't come he's going to be super hurt by it, but we also don't want anyone at the wedding to be uncomfortable. I've been struggling with people not coming and getting my feelings hurt by that and I keep having to remind myself that that's unfair of me to be upset with those guest. Fingers crossed since you have a some time left that people will do there part and we can get things under control before your wedding.

View Quoted Comment Exactly thank you so much for advice. I dont want to over think the situation. I feel if my parents can sit at their jobs for 8 to 10 hours and wear a mask they can where it at the wedding.

View Quoted Comment Thats exactly what I am trying to do. If they not able to make it then I may have to move forward without them. I am marrying the love of my life which he is center of my world. Life must move on.

View Quoted Comment Yup! Do what’s best for you. But it’s okay to let yourself feel sad about it.

View Quoted Comment Me too. Life must move on. I will not move my date of they are not able to make i will understand.

View Quoted Comment The biggest thing we’ve done is voiced how important it is for them to be there and assured them of the precautions we’re taking

I wouldn't get married if my parents weren't coming.

View Quoted Comment Working isn't really optional. They need to work to support themselves. Attending a wedding is optional and if they aren't comfortable attending then you to accept their wishes.

Both FH's parents and my mom live about 2000 miles away from where we currently live. Due to the pandemic and valid concerns about safety, neither set will be at our small wedding next week. It is really hard imagining the day without them physically there (we are zooming so they will still get to watch) and I've cried many times about it. But it is harder imagining them not being there for all the future days and the guilt I'll feel if they get sick and/or die from my wedding.

View Quoted Comment You are right. I didn't wanted to feel selfish about the way I feel. If you don't feel safe about attending I totally understand.

February is still several months away, so a lot could change between now and then. I think they should hold off on making a decision until closer to the wedding.