My fiance and I became engaged in December after 6 years of dating. We have already lived together for 5 years and have 2 dogs and 2 cats.
We are both very introverted people that enjoy small groups of close friends. Being the center of attention at large gatherings is neither of our cup of tea.
We initially told family that we were thinking of eloping and having only immediate family attend (grandparents, parents, and siblings). Both of out parents did not like this idea and pushed for us to have something larger, especially my mother and his father. The touchy subject of finances was not brought up much and my mother told me not to get hung up on that because we still hadn't even priced out anything.
Well, after we have now looked at 5 venues and narrowed down options my mother said my Dad panicked at the idea of splitting a $7,000 budget with my fiance and me. I feel like my childhood is happening all over again. This will inevitably end up in a screaming fight between my parents about money. I would prefer to call the whole thing off, but I know it will mortify my mother if I say the real reason to anyone. My fiance's parents are very wealthy. They are also very old fashioned and seem to think my paycheck to paycheck parents MUST have squirreled away thousands to prepare for this when I was born.
I am just starting to get frustrated and the fun of it all is quickly fading away. Ever since I was little, you could never truly enjoy anything nice like a vacation or going out to eat because I could always hear my parents bickering that we spent too much and shouldn't have indulged. I am $50,000 in student loan debt and expect to have that paid off in 6 years at my current pace. Maybe we can elope and then have something bigger once I am out of debt?
Has anyone else been through this type of situation? What did you do?
Thanks,
Leslie
