Parents don't like fiancé

I'm sorry. I wouldn't expect them to be super happy or very supportive since they don't like your fiance. They might make comments, but as long as you are happy and he treats you well, don't let their negativity bring you down. My husband doesn't believe in God and my family is very religious so they have made comments in the past how they don't agree with his beliefs, but my still like my husband. Is religion the only concern your parents have?

You're an adult in your own relationship with your fiance and she has no business dictating who you can and cannot be with. Obviously you and he love each other enough to want to get married and no one else has any right to get in the middle of it unless he is a criminal or has a secret life you don't know about. She doesn't have to like hime but she needs to respect your choice. If she refuses, then she's turning her back on her family. Set up and enforce boundaries with her that she either respects your choice of fiance or leaves you both alone and doesn't bring the subject up. Don't let her control you like you're a child with no free will. Best of luck.

Are you a practicing Christian? Statistically speaking, if a couple doesn't agree on religion then there is a high chance that the relationship will fail. If you and your FH agree on religion, then you should be fine, according to stats.

Agreement on religion does not mean you won't end a marriage because you are incompatible in other ways. And many who disagree on many aspects of religion still have enough similar values on an every day basis, making the same judgement calls about morals, or personal behavior, or what to teach their children, that they can be of quite different religions and have a long and happy marriage. If you have taken the time to find out each other's values, and find yourselves compatible, though not necessarily the same, make it clear that whatever her thoughts, nothing in Christian teachings says that it is helpful or right to sew discord between husband and wife. And that you would appreciate your parents support in your marriage, or failing that, their silence.

My parents have never supported my husband and I's relationship (we are high school sweethearts) so i understand how that feels. DM me if you want to chat about it!

My husband is Catholic. I am not Christian. I'm best described as an agnostic pagan.

Religion does not need to be shared.

Religion does NOT equal values, VALUES equal values. If the two of you have the same values, then you can navigate an interfaith relationship with confidence. While DH and I are sometimes at odds over things, we trust each other and communicate to come to a shared decision. Adding in kids will complicate that, but we respect each other's POV. We know we'll figure it out.

Honestly, your mother is showing *her* values, which appear to differ from yours. She values the nominal religion of someone, while you value their actions (how your FH has treated you). (This is not a judgment of either of those, it is merely an observation.)

In the end, it's your life, your choices.

If you let others make your decisions for you, they may not be in your best interest.

Sorry you are going through that. My advice is go for what you want, if you want to marry your fiancé then go for it. You're an adult, so don't live for your parents. Yes they may not be accepting of the situation, but you are grown.

It’s unfortunate that you want to share this joyous moment with your loved ones and everyone isn’t on Board, I’m sorry to hear this. She doesn’t have to accept your soon to be marriage but she minimally has accept it’s going to happen, and that it’s with or without her approval (I’m assuming). We can’t make everyone happy and that’ll definitely be more evident as your journey continues.


If you’ve had a discussion with your FH about religion and if you’ve come to an understanding, then what everyone else is saying should matter less (even if it’s immediate family) because it’s no one’s business except your own as to how you and your FH’s marriage will work out.
An elder of mine often repeats, "You can’t pay your bills with other people’s opinions. Wish them well and carry on."

My mom went nuts about me dating a non Christian. I havent actively gone to service or bible study in 4 years. She said id go to hell and " we arent evenly yolked" . I totally get it but we love each other dearly. We are a MATCH. So i kind of just ignored it. Im an adult. As well as you. If you love him and he feels the same maybe one day he will believe or whatever the case may be.

Depends on your parents. i've seen this go two ways:

1. friend married non christian and the parents still didn't support the marriage so much that they didn't attend the wedding.

2. non religious example, but basically my friend's mom doesn't like her husband at all. never liked him from the time they started dating and even now that they are married but she has accepted that it is what it is there's not really anything she can do because that's who her daughter chose and instead of being unsupportive where my friend would distance herself, she would rather show support outwardly.

Expect the worst, hope for the best. Good luck.

Ugh, this post is just one of the many, many reasons I utterly despise religion!

Your parents disapprove of your fiancé for reasons which will not change merely by reason of the fact that you’re now going to take the next step in your relationship and marry. They cannot stop you from marrying who you want, however, that is not to say they will not refrain from voicing their disapproval.

All I can say is this, be prepared to have your fiance’s back and stand by your decision. You need to lay down the law and assert that they need to accept your decision. Good luck!

View Quoted Comment Basically what Katie said, don't expect them to support you right away, but make it quite clear that they'll be ruining the relationship they have with you, if they choose not to support you.

Being a practicing Christian (by which I assume your mom means he doesn't go to church regularly) and having Christian values are two very different things. You can live your life in such a way that it reflects Christ-like intent towards your fellow human without believing in Jesus, or ever setting foot in church. If your FH is a good person who does good things and causes the least amount of harm he can, then your mom can be thrilled that you're marrying such a good guy. Remind her of the ways he carries out those values without necessarily having a 'title' or attendance record attached.