Amanda
Expert October 2019

Parent gifts

Amanda, on August 15, 2019 at 4:34 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 1 23
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Are y'all giving your parents gifts on your wedding day? I want to give my parents gifts as a thank you for paying for the wedding, but FH parents haven't helped or even offered to help. Should we get gifts for his parents as well?

23 Comments

  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle Online ·
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    You could get them something small. We did give ours gifts the day before at rehearsal dinner.
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  • Chandra
    Master May 2019
    Chandra ·
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    We gave each set of parents a nice gift card for a fancy steakhouse as a thank you.
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  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    Our parents aren't paying for a thing and we are giving them gifts.

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  • Allaura
    Devoted April 2021
    Allaura ·
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    My parents are paying for majority/all of our wedding so we are going to get them something. Probably something from their favorite brewery lol but my fiance's parents aren't helping and honestly haven't mentioned anything about it lol so we probably won't get them anything. If we get them something it will be small.

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  • Cheryl
    Expert November 2020
    Cheryl ·
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    According to this article from The Knot, which references their 2017 Real Weddings Study, the Bride's parents contributed 45% to the overall budget and the groom's family contributed 13%. This makes sense, since historically, the bride's parents did most of the heavy lifting when it comes to wedding expenses. It is proper etiquette to present all parents with gifts at the rehearsal dinner, if you're having one. They should all be around the same value. If you want to present your parents with a more substantial gift, perhaps you can do so separately before or after your wedding events.
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  • Courtney
    Master December 2019
    Courtney ·
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    We're making parents, and FHs grandma, Shutterfly books once our pictures come back.

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  • Misty
    Super October 2019
    Misty ·
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    You could always do something small.

    I got my future father in law custom collar stays from etsy. They came in an awesome little box

    Engraved with his name on one and "Dad, Father, Friend" on the other

    You could always do something equally sweet and small for future MIL. Etsy has these sweet little bracelets that come in boxes with "MIL quotes they run about $25 .
    • Reply
  • Tara
    Dedicated September 2019
    Tara ·
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    We got the moms earrings to match their dresses. I surprised them with the earrings during their dress fitting. As for the Dads go, I have no clue. My parents are however paying for our wedding and I plan on taking them out to dinner.
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  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
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    Gifts for parents are not necessary. Though I do not know a parent that would not keep, and reread, a sincere letter of appreciation from the couple. But if you want to give gifts, you may give gifts to one set and not the others. Just do it privately, when the others are not around.
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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    I can't imagine giving my parents something and not his parents. My dad paid for 80% of the wedding, my mom & stepdad paid for 20%, my fiance's father paid for the rehearsal dinner, his mother & stepmother didn't contribute at all. They all received gifts, it was a huge day for everyone.

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  • Katie
    Super November 2019
    Katie ·
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    FH and I are paying for our wedding but we are still giving the parents a gift as a "Thank you for raising us to be who we are" kinda thing
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  • Mary
    Expert July 2019
    Mary ·
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    We will be making a wedding album with our professional photos for both sets of parents. They each contributed different amounts to the wedding and we wanted to thank them with memories of the day.
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  • Krystal
    Just Said Yes April 2020
    Krystal ·
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    No. The reason you’re gifting to one set of parents isn’t relevant to the other, so, no.
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  • Formerbride
    VIP June 2019
    Formerbride ·
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    We gave my husbands parents a bottle of wine and a gift card to a restaurant. They hosted the rehearsal dinner.
    • Reply
  • Kelly
    Super October 2019
    Kelly ·
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    Our parents aren’t paying for anything, and we are gifting them small trinkets. My mom, & FMIL are receiving the same necklaces but one is MOB & the other is MOG. My dad is receiving a cigar cutter that says FOB 10.12.2019 & FFIL is receiving a tie clip that has a cross and says FOG. Most expensive gifts were $28 for the necklaces.
    • Reply
  • Yoice
    VIP March 2019
    Yoice ·
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    If you don’t give them presents I recommend you give the present to your parents alone to avoid getting anyone’s feeling hurt. We gave presents to both parents and they both helped us financially.
    • Reply
  • Amanda
    Expert October 2019
    Amanda ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    I should've mentioned FH isn't super close to either parents. He talks to his mom more than his dad but normally only sees both of them at holidays. His relationship with his dad isn't the best, unfortunately.
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  • Monique
    Master December 2019
    Monique ·
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    We will be getting them both gift cards for a date night and we will be writing our new in-laws a personalized thank you for raising the love of my life note.
    • Reply
  • Lynne
    Super July 2021
    Lynne ·
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    My FMIL lives out of state, the only thing she has mentioned is for us to have a happy life together and she wants pictures. She isn't able to travel. But, I'm going to have someone do a live feed for her.
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  • Nikki
    Devoted August 2020
    Nikki ·
    • Flag
    We are doing gifts for each set of parents. His parents haven’t helped much (understandable) so we are getting his dad an engraved knife and his mom a nice bracelet. Then I have my bio dad and step mom. I’m also getting them both a knife and a nice bracelet, since my bio mom and step dad are helping most with wedding I’m getting them a little bit more. My mom will be receiving a bracelet, ring, and a necklace. And my step dad will receive a engraved knife and an engraved lighter. All gifts will have a nice thank you card.
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