Overthinking at it's finest...advice please!

Maybe because you feel like you could mend your friendship to them and it being they were your besties it could just be a feeling of sadness that you used to think they were gonna be in your bridal party

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Totally agree. I just don't know why I feel so bad. I do feel sad and wished we were closer but the friendships just drifted off..

I get where you are coming from as I feel guilty for having my best friend that I have known for a shorter time than my other friend who would be a bridesmaid if I were having a bigger wedding and I have known longer but at the end of the day I know who I really want by my side. I have seen situations where someone may be a brides maid or MOH at someone's wedding and no be invited into the bridal party or have the same roles. Relationships change and honestly if you do not have as close of a relationship with these ladies do not feel obligated to make them a part of the party.

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You are very right.. Like I said, we are texting more because of my very soon wedding! I just feel so darn bad. My bridal party are friends and my sister that over the last few years I actually hang out with and talk to and vent to.. Just feel so guilty..

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I feel you. I mean add them if you want but I am not sure if they would be hurt not being invited considering that the increase in messaging has recently increased. Would it be too much of a hassle to invite them or do you feel worse about asking them to be in the party?

Everyone wants to return to simpler happier times. The best you can do is extend an invitation to each of them and their SO, and hope that though you only see each other now and then, when you do the issues are not important, but you all have a warmth of feeling that lives on. I have gone far from my home area, then 2 years after marrying, came back. A number of relationships that just drifted, or blew up, mattered to me. And as some others are in the area now, we have begun to be friends, often running in to each other because our kids meet. Only one person and I have a hearty dislike for each other, former neighbor and school Chum. The others, all it took was a tentative smile from each of us, and an invitation, and we are genuine friends . Different grown than as kids. But good differences. First time I ever read an etiquette book on weddings, I was a 14 year old bridesmaid. And I puzzled over the section of former friends and distant relatives. It said, if you have not sought out each other's company for 3 or more years, no personal visits, ( not due to long distance), then you should not invite them to your wedding. Unless you want to start up a former friendship, and fully intend to follow up and see each other again. Otherwise, let go. So, what do you want to happen? If they respond in a positive way, whether they can make it to your wedding or not, do you want to get together before or after the wedding, and be friends once more?

I understand feeling guilty because you're worried they are expecting to be in the wedding, but you're right, people grow apart.

I would only offer an explanation if they ask you about it, and explain that although you'd love them to be there for your on your special day, you'd prefer it be as a guest.

Good luck!

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Well, they are invited just not in the bridal party you know?

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That is such great advice, thank you! BUT.. it seems so harsh.. They really should understand that we grew apart. Like I said, we text and stuff but not as much as "bridesmaid" material you know?

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Such great advice, thank you! The one friendship will be hard to see each other because she lives a few states away. The other one lives about 10 minutes from me and like I said, we've seen each other once in 3 years because of our "falling out." Would I like to be friends or acquaintances with them after the wedding? Of course.. But we have grown apart, we have different friends, all that. But, we WERE best friends..

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I figured. I mean you can add them to the bridal party if you really feel guilty but I am not sure if that would be too much hassle but if not then as guests would be fine. I would not let it stress you out.

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I shouldn't have to just because I feel guilty you know?