Cassi
Devoted August 2022

Over thinking?馃

Cassi, on January 9, 2021 at 2:12 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 28
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I can鈥檛 help but be eager to plan our wedding and all of the details that will go into it. I鈥檓 not sure if now is a good time and I鈥檓 so weird and insecure about talking wedding talk with my girls馃槓I know I shouldn鈥檛 be but I just feel annoying talking about the big day. Is there a certain etiquette regarding wedding planning talks with your girls in the wedding? I am thinking about waiting for the new year to gain a couple months first, let everyone recuperate from the holidays馃し馃徑鈥嶁檧锔廔 think I鈥檓 over thinking it but I can鈥檛 help it. I always said my fianc茅e is so selfless and considerate of others-not that I never am but she鈥檚 definitely rubbed off on me and it鈥檚 intensified 鈽猴笍

28 Comments

Latest activity by Cassi, on February 9, 2021 at 2:38 PM
  • Mrs. Spring
    Master April 2021
    Mrs. Spring
    • Flag
    All I can advise is try to to talk about it every single day, all day with your loved ones.
    • Reply
  • Chantelle
    Devoted October 2021
    Chantelle Online
    • Flag
    My advice is to not talk about your wedding/wedding planning all the time and make sure to also talk about them/how they鈥檙e doing, and all the regular things you would talk about. Always come from a place of gratitude because your girls will be spending a lot of time/money/mental energy on your day.


    Also don鈥檛 feel bad or take it too personally if they don鈥檛 seem as happy or as excited all the time about your day. I鈥檓 sure they are happy and supportive, but no one is going to get as excited all the time about your day as you. It鈥檚 your day, but for most everyone else it鈥檚 just another nice day. Some days your girls will be all on your hype train, but some days you might not get all that energy and it鈥檚 okay. They鈥檙e still your besties!
    • Reply
  • Katie
    Rockstar August 2020
    Katie
    • Flag
    Hi Cassi, that鈥檚 very sweet of you. When we were engaged I tried to remember to ask my girls how they were doing and often times they would ask me and bring it up. Healthy balance of conversation 鉂わ笍
    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa
    • Flag
    I recommend talking with your bridesmaids only about what they are directly involved in (choosing bridesmaids dresses, timelines for day of, hair/makeup options, etc). It's totally fine to let them know of other plans as well (booking vendors, food tastings, etc), though I usually suggest limiting those discussions for a couple reasons:


    1. Having too many opinions (especially if they're all different) can be very frustrating. At the end of the day, you and your fiancee get final say on all those plans, so I would keep those plans mostly between you and your fiancee.

    2. I tried to limit my wedding discussion to my bridesmaids since I didn't want them to feel like we only ever talked about my wedding. I wanted to make a point to not discuss it (and a lot of the time, it was nice to not have to answer a billion questions about my wedding plans to people!), and instead continue on the friendships just as they had been prior to the wedding. Obviously, if they ask about the wedding, it's totally fine to share whatever details you're comfortable with! But I definitely wouldn't talk about it all day/every day. Be sure to mix in some conversations about how your bridesmaids are doing, and ask about what's going on in their lives.
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  • L
    Dedicated September 2021
    Lw Online
    • Flag
    I agree with others. Try not to only talk about it all the time. I had the same feelings as you until a friend told me it was weird I wasn鈥檛 talking about the wedding. So now I try to bring it up a little more, especially if someone asks or if something funny happens.
    • Reply
  • Belle
    VIP August 2022
    Belle
    • Flag
    I too, plan it to the detail. However, I don鈥檛 talk to anyone other than this board, because I don鈥檛 want to annoy anyone.
    • Reply
  • Nicole
    Master September 2020
    Nicole
    • Flag
    I had a long engagement (2+ years by the time we said I Do) and was very detailed, organized, and ahead on all my planning (we had all of our vendors hired and details figured out within the first year). That being said, I only talked wedding when I was directly asked about it or if it was an important piece of information that my family needed to know. I also didn鈥檛 ask my bridesmaids to be in the party until about 8 months out and only sent them one text about dresses 6 months out. I know you鈥檙e excited, but remember that while this is one of the most important days of your and your fianc茅e鈥檚 lives, it鈥檚 just another day to others. No one will ever be as excited about it as the two of you. Keeping wedding talk to a minimum will help to ensure your loved ones don鈥檛 get burnt out prior to the day.
    • Reply
  • Cassi
    Devoted August 2022
    Cassi
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    Thank you!! So far that鈥檚 what I do. And it helps. 馃檪
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  • Cassi
    Devoted August 2022
    Cassi
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    This helps alooootttt!!thank you so much!! I most definitely make a conscious effort to also talk about their lives and anything going on that鈥檚 important to them. I don鈥檛 ever want to come off self absorbed. But you鈥檙e so right, they鈥檙e not going to always be as 100% hype as me and that鈥檚 totally okay 馃憣馃徑 馃檶馃徑鈾ワ笍
    • Reply
  • Cassi
    Devoted August 2022
    Cassi
    • Flag
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    Yess!! That鈥檚 exactly why Chantelle said I and I couldn鈥檛 agree more with you both. Thank you!鈽猴笍鈾ワ笍
    • Reply
  • Cassi
    Devoted August 2022
    Cassi
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    Those are good points too! Thank you! I appreciate all the advice and suggestions 馃檪I will be sure that I talk about things that actually involve them directly. One of my friends asks a lot of questions and that鈥檚 helpful to me and not feeling like I鈥檓 telling her things she doesn鈥檛 care about. Thanks so much 馃檶馃徑鈽猴笍鈾ワ笍
    • Reply
  • Cassi
    Devoted August 2022
    Cassi
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    Thank you Kathleen! 鈾ワ笍馃檪and Congratulations on your engagement 馃嵕馃槏
    • Reply
  • Meghan
    Master October 2019
    Meghan
    • Flag
    I think being excited and talking to you鈥檙e friends about it is completely fine and normal. Now, I wouldn鈥檛 let that be the only thing you guys talk about, but mentioning milestones in planning is to be expected.
    If you feel like you want to talk all things weddings, this forum is a great place for that! All of us here loving hearing about wedding and offering advice if we can!
    • Reply
  • Cassi
    Devoted August 2022
    Cassi
    • Flag
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    I am very similar in mostly only posting in this app. I don鈥檛 want to be irritating, at least here, we all have one common topic 鈽猴笍Thank you! 鈾ワ笍And congratulations 馃嵕馃グ
    • Reply
  • Cassi
    Devoted August 2022
    Cassi
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    Thank you so much for the advice! I鈥檓 taking all the things everyone tells me into consideration 馃槏馃グI definitely don鈥檛 want to drain anyone, this helps a lot thank you!
    • Reply
  • Cassi
    Devoted August 2022
    Cassi
    • Flag
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    You鈥檙e right! And since I鈥檝e been engaged that鈥檚 what I do. Post mostly here and minimize how much I talk about it to others 鈾ワ笍Thank you!
    • Reply
  • Msalberts
    Master October 2021
    Msalberts
    • Flag
    I found that having 1-2 people to talk with regularly who are excited for it and also bring it up in conversations is nice! But also keep in mind to ask about & discuss things going on in their lives. 馃槉
    • Reply
  • Mrs. Spring
    Master April 2021
    Mrs. Spring
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    Oops. I meant, Try NOT to talk about it every day, all day with lovex ones.
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  • Cassi
    Devoted August 2022
    Cassi
    • Flag
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    You鈥檙e so right! Thank you!!馃グ鈾ワ笍
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  • Msalberts
    Master October 2021
    Msalberts
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    You鈥檙e welcome 馃槉
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