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Mary
Beginner August 2020

Out of town guest

Mary, on May 26, 2020 at 8:44 AM Posted in Planning 0 8


August 29th 2020 bride here in MA. Waiting for another of couple of weeks before we find out from the venue how we move forward. I had a lot of hope about keeping my wedding the way we planned it, but it's probably going to be 50 people. Our plan was to have parents, siblings, aunts, uncles and wedding party. I have a few friends in the wedding party coming from far away, NC, AZ, IL. Two of them will be working before with the public before the wedding, one friend is going to NJ before to visit family. I'm a little worried about them coming since they will be moving around a lot and my father in law to be is high risk. Do I tell them to get tested before they come and to quarantine before they come? I want my friends there and said they would all come, but I need to put health and safety first.

8 Comments

Latest activity by Mary, on May 27, 2020 at 2:40 PM
  • T
    Super October 2020
    Trisha ·
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    Considering Not EVERYONE Can Get Tested Just By Asking, I Don't Think That Would Work.

    Also If Your Guests Have To Work Prior There's No Way They Can Self Isolate.

    If You're Worried About Guests Safety, Then I Think Postponing Would Be Your Only Option Unless You Make It Local Guests Only.

    Your Guests Know The Risk They Are Taking When Traveling And Being Around A Group Of People. If They're Willing To Take That Risk, Then They Can't Blame Anyone But Themselves If They Happen To Get Sick.

    If Your Venue Is Requiring Social Distancing, Less people At Tables, Etc. That Would Help Too.

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  • A
    Super December 2020
    Anais ·
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    I agree with PP. I would think that anyone told to get tested to come to your event would find it quite rude. Plus, it can take a few days to get results back and in that time if they’re working they could potentially still be exposed to the virus.
    If you are that worried about the health and safety of your guests you should postpone
    • Reply
  • Kelsi
    Expert June 2020
    Kelsi ·
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    Another thing to consider, if you do ask your guests to quarantine or test before coming, that does nothing because they’ll be getting on a plane to travel and will be potentially exposed. If they don’t fly, then there’s exposure at gas stations, rest stops, etc. You can’t expect them to quarantine in a hotel in the state you’re getting married. Therefore making the testing/quarantine irrelevant.
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  • Alma
    Expert October 2020
    Alma ·
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    I would either make it a locals only event given the current circumstances, or postpone altogether Smiley sad
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  • N
    VIP September 2020
    Neeva ·
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    My out of town bridesmaids will likely not risk coming to the wedding with flying. Only my local ones or driving distance ones will likely come. I'm made my peace with it and it's honestly the best way at this point.

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  • Rebecca
    Master August 2019
    Rebecca ·
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    I agree with PPs. Unless you have a place where out of town guests can quarantine for 14 days...

    You say you have people coming from NC and AZ. Parts of both of those states are currently spiking, it is unlikely they will be able to travel safely, even by August.

    As for someone stopping here in NJ... we aren't yet at phase 1, so I don't know how feasible that will be.

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  • VIP August 2020
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    I wrote about why I chose to postpone my Massachusetts, August wedding and it might be useful even if you don't want to postpone yours:
    https://www.weddingwire.comwiedding-forums/why-were-postponing/3125cb7ca616936b.html

    But, that's not what you asked for. I think there are a few issues with you being able to do this safely, but they're different than what PPs suggested. (MA had a worse outbreak, but better testing, than most other states, so we're in a very different place.)
    Logistically:
    It sounds like you would only be asking a small number of people to quarantine, which I think is fine especially if they're in your bridal party and are willing and able to do it, although they would have to quarantine AFTER they arrived. In MA, you can get tested if you have a public facing job even if you don't have symptoms, so if they arrived early in the week, they could get tested and have the results before your wedding. The issue is that the tests aren't that reliable. They apparently miss about 30% of people who should have tested positive. So, if you test positive, you have it, but if you test negative, you probably don't have it, which isn't super comforting.I'm sure the idea of Zooming people in probably isn't very appealng, but if it's just a few very important people it's worth looking into.They can dress up and you can have food (and drinks? and flowers that look like yours?) delivered to them and make it possible for them to give speeches if they had planned to so it feels more like they're actually there.Whatever you do, just make sure everyone is really careful (masks, hand washing, etc.) and try to keep your most vulnerable guests separated from everyone else if you can.
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  • Mary
    Beginner August 2020
    Mary ·
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    Thank you..
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