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Just Said Yes October 2022

Out of town guest in my house a week before the wedding - is it too much?

Christine, on March 1, 2022 at 9:58 PM Posted in Community Conversations 0 5
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My FH and I have been living together for 3 years and we are getting married in the fall.

My best friend from college and his wife live in Asia. While my friend has more flexibility with his job in terms of taking time off, his wife doesn't - because she's a school teacher. However, he tells me that she's planning on taking a sabbatical leave for the fall semester and they will be able to attend the wedding. I was thrilled to hear the news!

We have a guestroom in our house, so I really want to have him and his family (wife and two young kids) stay for a few days before the wedding - that way we can catch up and I can help them feel more welcome and appreciated for flying all the way for my wedding.

But by FH thinks it's an outrageous idea to have guests stay over right before the wedding as we will be under a lot of pressure to host guests AND prepare for the wedding at the same time.

Since he's' so against the idea, I've decided to book a hotel for them. But was I being totally unreasonable and selfish to have guests stay in our house before the wedding?






5 Comments

Latest activity by Becky, on March 2, 2022 at 5:17 PM
  • L
    Super August 2023
    Lunajay ·
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    I don't think you were being selfish to let someone stay in your home as a guest before the wedding, that is what sweet kind hearted people do. Because of that sometimes we over look at the situation. It would be unreasonable because you wouldn't be a good host. There is a lot to be done week of and there will barely be time for you to spend time with them.

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  • Jmz
    Expert July 2022
    Jmz ·
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    I would agree with your husband, but regardless if you agree, if that's how your husband feels I'd still respect it. I get really overwhelmed and tired being around people and friends so I need that space, which isn't always something other people understand. Especially for the wedding, I think at least a nearby hotel so you can still easily meet up and enjoy each other, but also go home and have space to chill before The Big Day would be a good compromise. ❤
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  • K
    Dedicated May 2019
    Kylie ·
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    I am strongly with your husband here. So it is so wonderful that your friend and his young family are flying so far to celebrate your union! How special!
    But the days leading up to your wedding are usually crazy, and that’s important twofold: 1) you realistically just won’t have time to be a good hostess dealing with the final details, and your friends would likely be stuck at your house, unsure if they should make their own plans or what they should do. 2) those free moments you do have, your fiancé probably wants to spend alone with you! So much of wedding celebrations are entertaining and hosting others. You’ll want to cherish those final solo dinners or mornings alone.
    You are absolutely not being a bad host by not having your friends at your house (and honestly, no matter how young the kids are, four extra people in one room is A LOT), you’re being a good bride and wife to be!
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  • Samantha
    Super May 2022
    Samantha ·
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    I think it would be nice to have your friend there for support and to help with last minute tasks. Obviously they wouldn't expect you to be their tour guide, the whole reason they are coming is for the wedding. I am having several people around our house a few days leading up to the wedding, and I am relieved for the emotional support and extra hands!

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  • B
    VIP July 2017
    Becky ·
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    I agree with your FH. I wouldn't have wanted someone (let alone that many people) in my home leading up to the wedding. You're going to be distracted and trying to get last minute things done.

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