Out of state bridal shower please help

Could you ask if they would be comfortable hosting a bridal tea or a luncheon so that people don't feel like they're required to bring a gift? Or maybe you could do a recipe shower so that you don't have giant gifts to fly home with?

Hmmm this is tough. While the sentiment is nice from their end, as a guest I wouldn't take a flight for a bridal shower, I would just buy a gift and have it shipped to you. My friend's bridal shower was just her local guests. Her family that lives on the west coast didn't come, just sent gifts. Same thing happened when she had her baby shower. I would consider how many people actually live close enough to be able to come if it's worth having a legit party. You would still invite anyone you wanted to, but they would just have the gift shipped if they can't come!

Do you mean that not all your bridesmaids have SO's if you were to have a couples bridal shower? Or that you could go that route, but the bridesmaids all live so far? I would invite all the bridesmaids regardless of the type you have. Not sure about the one who isn't talking to you. That sucks. Why would she be mad you sent her an invite?

Ahhh I'm sorry that's so not your fault! She will have to be a big girl. I would maybe just send them to all the bridesmaids (including her) and include a little note saying I fully understand if you can't make the flight out I just didn't want to be rude and assume I should exclude my main ladies for that matter! It'd be proper on your end and if the one is bitter about it that's her choice! If you don't want to do it that way you could contact them and ask what they think before even sending invites and that way if they openly decline you don't have to send them one. I get that Europe is a whole other beast besides just the states, but I wouldn't want it to trickle down or something that you extended an invite to the others and not her, she might get more PO'd.

Not quite a bridal shower, but my mom hosted a "remote" baby shower for my brother and sister-in-law when they lived 13 hours away and were having their first baby. They weren't able to visit very often so she mailed invites to everyone she would normally invite (not them) and said if you would like to "shower" them with gifts have them delivered in this time frame. They received surprise gifts over the course of a week and were thrilled!

Obviously you can't do exactly that but I would have a get-together lunch in place of a shower with those people you want to invite. Make sure the invitation your family sends says to mail physical gifts to your address before/after the shower. Maybe you could make a game out of it? Guess who gifted you the toaster? The vacuum cleaner? Or perhaps film yourself opening the boxes and play it at the get-together? This is tricky, good luck!

"The bride-to-be will be traveling a long way to visit on this special day. Your presence is the only gift desired, but if giving, mailing to her address ahead of time will be required."