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Devoted September 2017

Out of State - Bridal Shower Gifts - Thank You Etiquette

Mallory, on May 18, 2017 at 1:37 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 5

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I'm getting married in September, currently live in the Midwest, but am moving to California in July. To avoid having to move the gifts across the country and risk breaking, we put our California address on the registry (where my fiance currently lives).

We started receiving gifts to the California address in March, so when I went out there in early April, we sat down and opened those together. I sent thank you notes immediately after to those people so they knew before they arrived to the shower that we received them and that we were extremely grateful.

Now my fiancé has received more gifts in California and one even arrived to my dad's house where the shower is being held. Should we open them and send thank you notes before the shower for gifts that arrived beforehand? I won't be out there again before the shower, so we cant do it together. I am of the mindset that it's better to over-thank, but I don't want to offend anyone by opening them before the actual shower. SOS

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5 Comments

Latest activity by APZ, on May 18, 2017 at 1:51 PM

VIP June 2016
Audrey · on May 18, 2017 at 1:43 PM
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I don't think there's anything wrong with opening gifts early and thanking them. We did that with wedding gifts we received ahead of time. Like you, we wanted people to know we had received their gift and to thank them. A couple were surprised we opened their gift prior to the wedding, but we just said we wanted to make sure we thanked them in a timely manner.
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Champion June 2018
muriel · on May 18, 2017 at 1:44 PM
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Gifts should be opened as they arrive and thank you notes sent immediately. There is no reason your FI can't open the gift, share it with you and then you write a note. I would say he could do the note too, but if these gifts are for the shower, not the wedding, then it is your responsibility.
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Master April 2017
Sara · on May 18, 2017 at 1:44 PM
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I sent thank yous as the gifts came in...if not I feel like people would be wondering whether they actually made it. If someone sent it before the shower, I dont think they would be offended if you opened it before the shower.
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Devoted September 2017
Mallory · on May 18, 2017 at 1:46 PM
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Thank you all SO much, I was weary to open them beforehand, but I think it's better for them to know that the gift was received and is appreciated.
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VIP March 2017
APZ · on May 18, 2017 at 1:51 PM
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I'd go ahead and open all the ones at your fiancés house (let him open or yall can facetime to do it together, whatever) and send thank you notes.
1-the storage space required for that many unopened boxes is STUPID! speaking from experience on this one..open, put away gift and breakdown the box asap!
2-most people want to know it arrived
3-it is one less thing for you to worry about later

the gift at your dad's...I would maybe save for the shower if it isn't too far out. Someone likely realized they wouldn't make it to the shower and mailed it there purposefully....but if you want, it would be acceptable to go ahead and open and thank them now too...whichever you prefer. Personally get as many thank yous out as you can now. They come back to bite you in the ass later! Finally just got my last ones out this week (2 months after the wedding)
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