Sooo its not as serious as the title imply but I just need to let it out because my skin is crawling about it now 
So like many of you we had to cancel our June wedding and I'm so over people saying "well its not that big of a deal, you can always just reschedule." or thinking that saying rude comments about this not being as heartbreaking as it really is because we have made the decision to elope instead. Its all these older people who have been married for years and they forget how important this time in a young couples life is. And I know its not the end of the world - this is all coming from me, someone who wanted to elope from the get go! But I've spent HOURS AND HOURS planing every detail for it to just all slowly be destroyed. So yeah i guess you can say I'm a little salty about it all.. In 25 years I wont be able to say "oh honey look at this *insert sentimental wedding gift* that your aunt gave us on our wedding day" Because we wont get that, there will be no bridal shower or other parties celebrating us, and it sucks!!
I know I'm sounding like such an entitled brat right now and it was our decision to do a very small ceremony on the day instead of our big wedding we planned - but that doesn't mean my feelings are invalid..
Anyway my boss is ULTRA paranoid about everything and thinks the whole summer should be cancelled - do nothing, go nowhere, talk to nobody.. She started to talk to me about our wedding on June 6th, I told her we are going to have like 25 peoples tops all outdoor. Shes telling me "nope, you're not going to be able to do that, that will just never happen. you guys will have to figure out something else to do. How do you plan to do it so everyone is social distanced" and goes on to say "I heard this family had a birthday party a while ago and everyone caught it, that's probably going to happen to you guys if you go through with this" Now this is wear i snap.. and now looking back i feel bad. But i just told her "We going to do what were going to do" ugh.. Someone tell me I'm not the only one who has just reached their breaking point with all of this.. I didn't mean to sound rude or come off like I'm not taking this seriously but I just truly think our state will be fully opened and functional by then. To have a large gathering and be reckless? no, but at least a gathering of 25 people will be ok.
