Opinions Please... Guest List Blues

If it helps - no kids.

and then try to keep the list as current as you possibly can like maybe people you haven't spoken to in a year or something like that.

I made a spreadsheet with all of our guests and ranked them. We had columns for whose guest they were (primarily his friends, my friends, or shared friends), where they lived, their plus ones, etc and were very easily able to break out our guests into tiers and find a good cutoff point.

For example, immediate family were 0s, wedding party members were 1s, close friends and non-immediate family were 2s, good friends 3s, and so on. Then we were able see how many people we had at different levels and could decide where our cutoff point was, which ended up being between the 3s and 4s. I could also make sure our "sides" were fairly even.

It worked really well for us!

I agree for going either all adults or immediate family. If you're having a real big issue, like you mentioned, you can elope. A few months after or sometime the following year, you can then hold a reception only celebration with everyone you've intended in the first place.

You can most definitely do that!

I would do kids-only, and then pick your must-haves and add in where you can if you still have space. Sometimes adding limited numbers is easier than cutting people.

Girl, I feel you, I want a little bigger than your list, but have to make cuts and it's hard knowing where. I am basically narrowing it down to those who know us best together and individually. Those who will help build our marriage rather than tear us down by having their presence. You cannot make everyone happy. It is about you and your future husband, not everyone else. Just think true closest people, that bring good into the relationship. I hope this helps! You got this!

Thank you... I appreciate your response. That is how we ended up here, but I am going to take a step back and take another look. We have been together for so long that we have a lot of great friends, so we have to make some tough decisions. I do agree that we need to consider who is closest to us in terms of relationship building, so that may help. Thanks, again!