Open Bar

Yikes.. just a heads up you might want to see if you can get this posed taken down before you get bombarded with hate...

Personally cash bars are normal in my area so that's what we are doing. But on these forums people treat you like your the worst person in the world for thinking about doing a cash bar.

You just do you girl

Maybe consider a limited bar with just beer and wine. It is awkward if your bridal party gets free drinks and the next guest has to pay.

I think cash bars are rude in general, but paying for some guests and not others is way worse.

It's definitely weird if some people get to drink for free and others don't. I think it should be all or nothing. I would suggest a more limited bar with just beer and wine, and see if you can pay on a consumption basis instead of per person since a lot of your family doesn't drink. Or just have a dry wedding. It doesn't matter what you have, but it should be hosted by you.

It is rude to ask people to pay money for something at the reception - which is their thank you for attending your wedding ceremony. You wouldn't invite someone to your house for dinner and then charge them for the wine they drank - this should be treated the same way.

Yes, I think it’s rude to pay for some guests and not others. As a guest, I WOULD have a bad time If I saw people getting free drinks and I had to pay for everything . This also gets out of hand easily— the bridal party members would likely share their drinks with their SOs or friends which would be even more isolating for every guest not in the “in” crowd.

It would be rude to pay for some people’s drinks but not others, as well as extremely confusing on the bartenders and venue staff. Since the family doesn’t drink I would see if you can have a consumption bar.

View Quoted Comment Yes ! A consumption bar is the best solution to this problem. If a large number of your guests are non-drinkers, you’re not wasting a bunch of money to have an open bar for everyone. With consumption, you only pay for drinks actually ordered.

I agree- this may come across as rude by your other guests. At a friend's wedding they had an open bar on beer and wine with liquor being cash. (Not their decision but the venue's). However, the bartenders would sneak us wedding party members a shot every now and then if no one was around.

In my opinion/ region cash bars are fine. However paying for some and not all isn't ok in my book.

You may be surprised how many "non-drinkers" will have a drink or two at a social event like a wedding. I am of the opinion that your reception is to thank your guests for attending your wedding and as such all food and beverages should be provided to your guests free of charge. Now, as others have suggested, there are multiple ways to offer an open bar without breaking the bank: consumption bar, beer and wine only, beer, wine and signature cocktail. But the options should be available to all guests, not just your wedding party.

The best thing is if you can't pay for everyone to not have a bar at all, and just have soda and water.

Try a consumption bar. Cash bars are not good and asking some to pay while others drink for free is really bad. I understand trying to keep costs down. Truly! If beer and wine for everyone is out of budget then next step is consumption. If word "happens" to get around you are footing the bill per drink, guests may choose to drink less or not drink.

View Quoted Comment Hahahahahaha!!! Yes!

I definitely think it may come across as rude - either pay for everyone's drinks or no one's drinks. If budget is the issue, consider a limited bar. "open bar" for beer, wine and/or a certain cocktail, but cash bar for the rest. Or some other option halfway between cash bar and open bar.

Where I'm from, open bar is the expectation. Cash bars are considered somewhat tacky. (Obviously this is not the case in other places, just where I am!) Many combat the "tacky" thing by offering limited open bars, and it seems to work fine.

I will agree with the rest either pay for all by doing a limited bar, consumption bar, etc. instead of paying for just the bridal party.

If you decide to do the cash bar make sure it is known ahead of time. The one I went to we didn't know and I was not happy because we didn't have cash and therefore had to run around to get some.

As someone who doesn't drink beer or a ton of wine I would much rather that and would drink it than having to pay for my own drinks.

How will your venue specify who you pay for? I'm not even sure how that would work. It seems rude to have some guests pay and some not. I get annoyed at cash weddings but not as annoyed as dry weddings! Typically I've noticed cash/dry weddings aren't less of a party atmosphere later in the evening but they still have all the normal wedding reception things and we still have a good time!