Open bar... the norm?!

Weird, I live in the Midwest as well (though ND is pretty well known for its boozers), and every wedding I've ever been to has had a substantial bar. Some are eventually cash bars, and sometimes it's strictly all cash bar after your first drink. We're doing wine and beer, but no other hard alcohol. Don't feel like you have to follow the norm. We thought about no alcohol at all, but eventually conceded that we needed to at least serve wine and beer, for fear my huge family would riot .

Well I’ve been to 2 weddings...the first beautiful with great food and an open bar. Wedding number 2... catered by chick-fil-a and only soda. I don’t even count number 2 as a wedding.

Grew up in Iowa, and all the weddings I've been to have been in the Midwest. All had at least a modified open bar (beer/wine only), except the one that was a cake and punch reception for a wedding that occurred during a normal church service.

I am invited to my first drink ticket to cash bar wedding and am planning on bringing a flask. After paying for a flight, hotel, and rental car, I am sure as heck not getting out my wallet to pay for a drink.

ETA: I agree with pps that it's not truly a regional thing. Some people swear not doing an open bar is a regional thing in the Midwest, but it is the norm for a lot of people in the Midwest. It may be a thing in your group of friends, or your family, but it's not a regional thing.

Ontario, Canada and I've only seen an open bar.

I'm from the South. I've been to three dry weddings. One wedding that had alcohol being served. I've been to one that had a cash bar out in the lobby. I didn't know open bat was the norm until I joined wedding wire. I didn't know that dry weddings was a no no.

I’ve been to weddings in NJ and it’s been open bar. However my friend’s wedding was half open bar and other half of the time cash. I think It depends on the couple’s budget and venue. Luckily my venue includes open bar. There were some venues that We went to see and it wasn’t included and it had options of cash bar.

Hey! We are doing a open bar for 1hr only then guest can buy their own drinks it’s cheaper that way On us 😊

I’m in the Chicago suburbs, and I’ve been to maybe 12 or so weddings in the past 10 years. Every single one was open bar. I’ve never been to a cash bar or a dry wedding.

New England here and I have never been to a cash bar wedding, ever.

I’m from NJ and any event I have gone to in a formal catering hall, from a sweet 16, bar/bat mitzvah, to a wedding have been open bar.

I’ve never been to a wedding without an open bar....if that helps

I've been to mostly dry weddings, because of religious reasons in my extended family/friends.

But a few with an open bar, I think. And I do remember one that was a cash bar, & I remember briefly thinking that might be tacky. Didn't affect me because I don't drink personally.

My daughter's wedding will be open bar, with beer and wine. Is that called open bar?

I would expect it, but I haven't been to many weddings that had it. I also haven't been to many weddings.

I've only been to one wedding with a cash bar. Worst wedding ever, though for a number of reasons. The groom's parents were mortified when they found out the bar was cash and that it was a self catered wedding (small town and reception at VFW) since they had given the couple a substantial amount to help fund the wedding, but had then butted out on the planning. The groom's father gave everyone on the groom's guest list cash to use at the bar. Rude, perhaps, but the bride's family had purchased the liquor and was trying to recoup the cost if not make a profit. The groom's guests were all seated at tables on the far side of the hall. Worst seats in the house. Guests closest to the buffet were allowed to go to the buffet first, then those in the middle. A self serve buffet, by the way. I would estimate 70% of those guests had enough food on their plates to feed 2 or 3 people which explains why the food ran out before the groom's guests got any. The groom's father then ordered pizza for his family and friends. The bride's mother was pissed at the groom's father and told him how rude he was being. God bless the groom's grandma who looked at the MOB and said, "What? We should starve?"

I was astonished by some of the other guests who asked if they could have pizza even though they had already had dinner. By this time, the groom's brother was really pissed and told them "no, you've already had your dinner.....and ours."

Needless to say, the groom's guests left early and still talk about what a mess that was. We did have a great time at the hotel bar that night and the groom's parents paid for all the drinks.

View Quoted Comment Cheaper on you? How about only inviting the amount of guests you can afford to host the entire night?

I'm from the Midwest and it is normal for cash bars. I've been in several weddings as a bridesmaid, with cash bars. I've been to one open bar out of all the weddings I've attended. I'm doing beer/wine and cash bar. I'm not concerned about it.

Don't blame your region. I've been to many weddings in different parts of the Midwest, all open bars or dry cake and punch in the church hall. None considered asking guests to open their wallets, because that's rude.

Although I do remember one where the groom bragged about buying the booze in Canada and when it was gone it was gone, and the party ended.

I'm on Long Island, I've only been to weddings with open bar. My wedding was open bar, full martini menu, shots permitted and nobody was inappropriately drunk. A few people having a lot of fun but nothing to worry about.

I am in the burbs north of Chicago and I would say open bars are the norm... to the point where if a wedding has a cash bar it's a faux pas... like you want people to come to your wedding, bring a gift and pay to drink? that's the train of thought at least in my experience... although I can only actually remember it happening once, when I was too young to drink but my mom brought it up when I started wedding planning so it must have really stuck out in her memory!

Small town wisco here.. and I work at an event venue.. this past season we hosted over 60 events and of those I can tell you they were all open except 3 cash bars and two dry weddings .. there were an additional 2 weddings that started open for cocktail hour and went to cash after that .. but one of those actually went back to open bar after some unhappy family members spoke with the parents of the groom ..
not all of them were premium liquor some were only beer and wine but hosted none the less ... mine will be hosted but am undecided on what exactly