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Beginner May 2021

October Wedding

Ally, on July 16, 2020 at 12:03 PM Posted in Community Conversations 0 21
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Any other October brides holding out hope still?!?

We are supposed to be getting married October 9th in Massachusetts, and have another reception 2 weeks later in Pittsburgh, PA.

So far we are just holding out hope that we will be able to have both, even though both states keep changing their guidelines (so stressful)

What is the latest you are holding out before deciding to reschedule??

I have also said for WEEKS I want to reschedule because it is giving me awful anxiety and making me so stressed out I can't function. But both set of parents just keep saying to relax and that everything will be fine and workout, and won't let me reschedule even though I've said multiple times I want to reschedule already and not keep waiting.

21 Comments

Latest activity by AugustBride, on July 29, 2020 at 10:00 AM
  • K
    Expert October 2020
    Katie
    • Flag
    We postponed our reception a couple of weeks ago and we were going to just do a private ceremony but this week our governor closed churches so I am waiting to talk to our deacon about what our options are for a marriage.
    • Reply
  • Chrysta
    Rockstar November 2021
    Chrysta Online
    • Flag
    We have postponed 馃槶
    • Reply
  • Brittany
    Rockstar October 2020
    Brittany
    • Flag

    So our wedding is planned for October 31st and I still haven't sent out invitations nor heard from our venue about if we are moving forward. We live in Las Vegas and its changing every day. We will be waiting until July 31st to make our final decision to postpone. So for you, I would be really looking at how many people and if you feel comfortable waiting until the very last minute to keep going or postpone.

    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Devoted October 2021
    Lisa
    • Flag

    We postponed out October 10, 2020 wedding to October 7, 2021. Smiley sad

    • Reply
  • Anna
    Just Said Yes June 2021
    Anna
    • Flag

    I can't speak for Mass., but you may find you'll have difficulties with your Pittsburgh reception. I am getting married in PA and our October 3rd wedding has officially been postponed due to Gov. Wolf's new orders. If our wedding had been outdoors we might have made it, but unfortunately the governor decided there's to be no gatherings of more than 25 people indoors.

    • Reply
  • A
    Beginner May 2021
    Ally
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    That's why I'm getting more stressed! Our DJ emailed us today.

    It's frustrating cause for weeks I've said I just want to postpone, but both sets of parents just keep saying to relax and everything will be fine and won't let me postpone or have a say.

    • Reply
  • Anna
    Just Said Yes June 2021
    Anna
    • Flag

    That has to be super frustrating. I hate the social politics of wedding planning - like if it were up to just me and FH, this would be so much easier. But we love our parents, so we deal with their nonsense...

    Anyway, I think this change in policy is probably a great opportunity to reopen that discussion with the parents and start working out a Plan B. Let them know that - as it stands right now - you won't be able to have the Pittsburgh reception. That's a fact. That might change, but you want to be prepared just in case. Maybe framing it as Plan B will ease them into the idea that it might not happen the way they wanted initially, while still demonstrating to them that you value their input on the backup plan. Then if things don't change by a designated date - perhaps the last day you have to order your invitations to get them out on time or the last day you have to give your vendors notice - then you all agree to execute Plan B.

    That's just an idea, but you definitely have reason to reopen this conversation and stand your ground if rescheduling is the best course of action.

    • Reply
  • Teddy_bear525
    Savvy October 2020
    Teddy_bear525
    • Flag
    Our wedding is 10/4, in SoCal. It鈥檚 a mess here, pretty much all indoor activities are closed due to the governor鈥檚 order. My entire wedding is outdoors and my venue hasn鈥檛 reached out to cancel yet. I鈥檓 still hoping that it would happen. But who knows what鈥檚 going to happen by October. I haven鈥檛 even started on my invitation yet. Holding on till August and decide if I need to postpone or not. 2020 has just been an emotional roller coaster. But I feel like this virus is not going anywhere even in 2021. I鈥檇 rather be in fear for another 80 days than another entire year! I鈥檓 ready to get married in October even if I can鈥檛 have the reception, I鈥檒l be fine with just a small ceremony with just family, 10 ppl max.
    • Reply
  • W
    Dedicated October 2020
    Waitingtomarry20
    • Flag
    The anxiety comes from not making a final decision.
    Talk to your parents and/or vendors to see when it is the latest you can reschedule. That way you know a time frame to ease some of your anxiety.
    Eloped in Nov 2019, wedding ceremony on 05/02/20 moved to 10/03/20. Now having to change plans because don鈥檛 want to be responsible if guests do get sick. As of right now, what I would like to happen is to take some pictures and have a little celebration. Oh well! I can鈥檛 wait for this year to be over.
    • Reply
  • Shana
    Dedicated October 2020
    Shana
    • Flag
    Ultimately you have to do whatever makes you the most comfortable! My wedding is October 10 and my fianc茅 and I decided we鈥檙e getting married that day whether it鈥檚 the way we鈥檝e been planning or just me and him. At this point there鈥檚 no telling what could happen. I live in Pittsburgh so it鈥檚 definately been up and down but our wedding is about an hour and a half north of here in an area that hasn鈥檛 been so bad with COVID. Even if we would have postponed to next year, who鈥檚 to say we aren鈥檛 gonna have the same things going on? Pandemics can last for years, and until there鈥檚 a vaccine I don鈥檛 think things will change much as far as restrictions and masks go. So again, it鈥檚 up to you what you decide to do but I don鈥檛 think there鈥檚 a right or wrong answer! Honestly I鈥檓 so ready for it all to be done so I don鈥檛 have to stress about it either but if it was next year that means I would just be stressed for longer haha
    • Reply
  • Marissa
    Devoted October 2020
    Marissa
    • Flag

    I'm still holding on! Our wedding is 10/10 and we live in northern CA. The county that the venue is in has really low cases, so I'm hoping we can still have it there! Our backup plan is to just move everything in my FH's parent's backyard, which I know will also be beautiful if we decide to do that. Either way we want to get married this year no matter what. And then later down the line, once covid is gone, we plan to have a big anniversary/celebration party with all of our families, friends, and co-workers!

    • Reply
  • M Hsu
    Savvy October 2021
    M Hsu
    • Flag
    Our wedding is on 10/30/2020 in Southern California. It鈥檚 so hard to decide to keep going or postpone. I鈥檓 going to wait until middle of August to make that decision.
    • Reply
  • Ingrid
    VIP October 2020
    Ingrid
    • Flag
    We're still moving forward with our Jamaica DW in October. Everything has been paid for and they're reopening the resorts slowly over time.
    • Reply
  • Jenny
    Savvy October 2020
    Jenny
    • Flag

    10/24 in SoCal as well. For all the couples waiting until August to decide, when are you planning on sending invites? I have had what I want to order in my cart for months now and just keep stressing about finalizing the order. But I don't want to send invites super late...

    • Reply
  • L
    Just Said Yes March 2021
    Lena
    • Flag
    We just decided to postpone our 10/2/2020 wedding to 5/23/21. We both live in NY but our wedding will be in Atlanta. I鈥檓 even tempted to postpone it to 10/2021- just to be on the safe side. But I feel like that鈥檚 so far out 馃槱
    • Reply
  • M Hsu
    Savvy October 2021
    M Hsu
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    I sent my invites last week to give people time to RSVP. On the invites, I have it stated to visit our wedding website for more details and there is an announcement about how we are continuing to plan for our October 30th wedding and that we have a backup date if we need to postpone. If there is a postponement, I will make another announcement post and send out postponement postcards to our guests.
    • Reply
  • L
    Beginner August 2020
    Lee
    • Flag

    Massachusetts is no dance floors and no bars, and I do not see that being lifted any time in 2020. So I would at least check in with your DJ as you may want to alter those plans. Additionally, if alcohol is important to you, then I would also explain that to the parents for another reason to postpone. We were August in MA and no dancing and no wine was the final straw.

    • Reply
  • Callee
    Just Said Yes October 2020
    Callee
    • Flag

    We were getting married Oct. 17 2020 in Florida where we live now, but we cancelled things here and are instead having a small ceremony only in Pittsburgh where we are both from so that no one except us has to travel. Right now we do have a church scheduled in Pittsburgh but worst case we will get married just us in a back yard ceremony. We did postpone our reception/celebration until October 16, 2021 here in FL - we felt too stressed about waiting to make a decision about that. For the ceremony at the church we feel we can keep a small enough group safely social distanced, but for the reception we thought it was too risky/stressful to keep it this year as planned.

    As others have said, I felt a huge sigh of relief once we made the decision finally and even though it's not what we had originally hoped for, we are now super excited about our new plans even. Everyone will have different opinions on it but you have to go with what you and your fiance feel most comfortable with and what would cause you the less stress and most happiness. We had to come to terms with letting go of some of the dreams we had for this year, but once the decision was made we were very quickly able to picture our new dreams and are just as excited. Smiley smile

    • Reply
  • Cristina
    Expert October 2020
    Cristina
    • Flag
    We also have not postponed our October 25th wedding in California. We live in the immediate bay area and things have been shut down forever so we honestly don't know whats going to happen. We are going to wait til either the last week of August or 1st week of September before making a final decision. We're keeping our fingers crossed 馃
    • Reply
  • Shaina
    Beginner October 2021
    Shaina
    • Flag
    We are currently still set to hold our 10/24 wedding in Colorado but I stress about it constantly because of the uncertainty. We are determined to get married that day but I have no desire to have an elopement/small ceremony this year and a reception/big party next year. I would rather just have a single day, no matter how small, but FH and I don鈥檛 see eye to eye on that. I just get stressed out about the details and cost involved with shifting things around, especially as some of our vendors haven鈥檛 been as flexible as I would have hoped to see them be about possible movement of dates and estimated numbers.


    We are sending out invitations this week with the idea of giving people time to decide but also to get a sense for who is a 鈥渄efinite no鈥 because of COVID - if we can get more of a sense for what the number of people who may realistically come this year or not is, hopefully we can make more informed decisions about things like how much space we would need for reasonable social distancing accommodations and such.
    • Reply

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