NWR: Anyone else's SO HATE receiving gifts? Do you get them anyway?

Mine does, I just ignore it and give them anyway

Ug. Gifts are a big point of ranting for FH. He has certain things that will prompt a rant from him and I have heard this one many times already. I still get him gifts! What works for us is more personal gifts. Something like a scrapbook of us together or something I made for him. The personal meaning behind the gift is valued by him.

My FH is a former Jehovah Witness and even though he's not practicing, it's amazing how his upbringing has colored his views on EVERYTHING. He doesn't really believe in gifts and it was hard for me to wrap my mind around it. They're just not valuable to him--giving or receiving doesn't have any emotion for him. I grew up in a family that does gifts (probably too many) every birthday and Christmas, so it's very different for me.

But read the love languages if you haven't (even just a short online profile)--it really helped me to realize that he just doesn't work that way, and if I tie my emotions into gifts with him I'm just setting myself up for disappointment.

He's cute though, he tried really hard and got me a lot of really good gifts last year for Christmas--so I think this year my gift to him is to say no gifts this year at all, hah

AMW, I read that YEARS ago. lol

He's more of a quality time, or an acts of service guy, for sure....

I feel like he sometimes gets the short end of the stick as far as "buying things" goes...I'm not high maintenence by any means, but I get the eye brow waxes, the pedicures, dance classes, workshops...he's been wanting to save up to finish his tattoos, but always ends up spending that money at the bars when we go out, or on sushi. He's really passionate about food, and entertaining, so he says he doesn't really mind when he "goes without." He'd rather make me happy...but in this case, getting him something he'll love and use all the time would make me REALLY happy. lol

Mine does. He makes a lot more money than I do and would rather me just not buy him stuff. Of course that's not how things work, so we usually just set a good budget for special occasions and go from there. We both have Amazon wish lists that we keep updated and then we can pick things the other actually wants. It's way easier than having to guess.

@Yasminadlv I think my FH is the same---he's so hard to buy things for because he's not materialistic at all. Now instead of stuff, I buy him experiences--we went on a private fishing tour for his birthday last year and he LOVED it. Unfortunately that's way more expensive than buying him a movie and a sweater, but it's sort of a present for me too to do something together.

If you got him a certificate or surprised him with some time at the tattoo salon, would that work?

We read the Love Languages too. Gifts ended up being the lowest for both of us, but as time has passed, I learned that I still value them more than he does.

He hates gifts. Absolutely hates them.

So I just ask him what he wants - and he'll normally hold off on buying something he would normally buy himself so I can get it for him.

Otherwise I buy things we can both use since he would prefer that.

Like one Christmas/Birthday I bought a bunch of booze and nice decanters and stuff for our home bar.

I like doing those things together too.

I got a voucher for $125 dining credit at a new, really amazing restaurant in town, so I think the week between our birthdays, I'm going to take us out there, too. That way we can both have a great dining experience together.

I WISH she hated getting gifts hahaha

Yes and yes. And sometimes I hit him upside the head with the box to knock some sense in to him! Kidding!!! (sorta)

It was a hard lesson for me to learn so I am teaching him: the same way we love to give gifts, we have to allow others to do for us in return. Not easy but getting there

DH's love language is not receiving gifts but I love buying stuff for him. It used to be an issue but we have come to an understanding now. He realized that I love buying him stuff and that it makes me happy so that makes him happy. It helps that I'm a great gift giver too.

DH hates receiving gifts but he's the first one to buy someone a gift.