Nosey Venues?

I don't think they necessarily think every couple will book with them. I think maybe, from a business and marketing perspective, they want to understand who their biggest competitors are and get a feel for what things their venue may be lacking or in what ways they differ from those that were ultimately chosen by couples who inform them they are going elsewhere. As a business, you want to know who your biggest competitors are, and this is a free and relatively simple way of gathering that type of data.

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I agree with this 100%. And I think it was nice of you to email all of your prospective vendors, I didn't do that at all. For the ones who followed up with me I let them know that I found somewhere else but I didn't email them on my own lol

View Quoted Comment Exactly this

They just want to see their competition. I probably wouldn't respond bc I'm a very private person. I would probably call and tell them via phone why I chose the other venue.

It's fine not to respond. But it's a business not a personal transaction, so them asking isn't rude. Like PP said, they want to learn who their competitors are.

I had venues ask us what the reason was that we didn't choose them (as opposed to where we booked instead). I didn't see it as rude, I saw it as them trying to determine why couples aren't choosing them (price too high? Room layout too inconvenient? Specific policies?), so they can try to address those issues and increase the chances of future couples booking the venue. I agree with a previous comment, they're likely asking so that they can determine who their biggest competitors are.

Agreed, it isn’t meant to be rude. If you think about it, the only feedback/reviews venues typically get is from brides who pick them. This doesn’t really highlight their weaknesses.
The venues who asked I tried to give open and honest feedback (eg. Getting ready area was too small, venue was too spacious for my size wedding). It just helps them make sure they are succeeding with their target audience.

View Quoted Comment This makes more since ti me than asking where you booked, like “what could we have done better” and sometimes it’s just that the couple was looking for a different style or vibe, but if it happens a lot then it could be that they’re losing touch with current trends and should update some things.

View Quoted Comment I agree. After seeing everyone’s responses I see now where they were likely coming from, and it’s more than likely not coming from a rude place. I guess it’s all in the wording like you said. I probably would’ve been less taken aback if they worded it exactly like that! “What made you choose them over us? What could we have done different” versus “where did you book instead of us?” Because in all reality they were the nicer venue lol the only reason we didn’t go with them was because of our budget.. they’ll have no problem booking with couples with a larger budget than ours

I work in child care as an administrator. Every year the director will call the surrounding child care centers to check what they are charging/offering to parents. It helps keeps them from not charging too much/too little for what they're offering. I'm sure this venue is doing the same thing.

It’s okay not to respond, but I don’t think it’s rude at all that they asked. Mainly they want to know what could’ve influenced your decision, price/location/date availability/etc. New wedding venues are popping-up all over the place, so they may also be asking to see what’s out there.

Yeah, this happened to us with at least one venue. (Possible a second, but that one was such a mess that I didn't even know how to respond... because it would have started off with, "You insulted millennials to A PAIR OF MILLINNEALS because you think we are all terrible and also 16.")

I know the one we responded to had noticed that we liked a lot of the venue, and she was pretty new at her job.

It wasn't *her* fault there was a larger than life hagiography-style portrait of Herbert Hoover in the cocktail hour room. It wasn't even a political reaction for us, honestly. There was a similar portrait of AN UNKNOWN WOMAN at the other end of the room. So.

Uh.

It was a little weird.

(It was, in fact, a political venue, which was concealed on the website, so there were other political tones to the venue, including pictures and such, but the part that REALLY THREW US was the pairing of Hoover and an anonymous lady looming over you during cocktail hour. Just. Um. Uh. No, thanks.)

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Haha, WOW, I bet that was an experience! So strange! I took the time to look at a few venues in my area, but they were all professional and set up as a blank canvas.