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shessica
Dedicated April 2016

Non-Hosted Pre-Wedding Night Out

shessica, on October 29, 2015 at 12:41 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 8

Hi everyone. We're having a daytime Sunday wedding, and I wanted to include any guests coming in for the weekend on a "last night out" gathering at our favorite local restaurant. (We are not having an evening rehearsal or rehearsal dinner.) This would not be a hosted event, so I'm wondering if and how I should include this information on the wedding website. What would be the best way to get the word out about such a pre-wedding social event while keeping expectations clear? Is it acceptable to list it as a "wedding event" - mainly so people could RSVP (to allow us to give the restaurant an accurate headcount if it will be large party)? (Is there some kind of appropriate wording I could use to inform everyone that it's non-hosted?) Or, should I simply mention the outing in a "Local Activities" section? Other suggestions? TIA!

8 Comments

Latest activity by shessica, on October 29, 2015 at 12:41 PM
  • E&J
    VIP October 2015
    E&J ·
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    We had a casual gathering with some friends a couple days prior to the wedding, separate from the rehearsal dinner. We just sent out an email to those we wanted to join us, and because it was a casual happy-hour/pizza gathering, nobody expected for it to be hosted. We didn't put it on the wedding website, though, because we wanted to keep it small and didn't want to make it an official wedding event. I think email or word-of-mouth typically works best for these kind of situations.

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  • Mrs. RATR
    Master September 2016
    Mrs. RATR ·
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    Just make sure you say "We'll be here if you want to join us" or something like that. If you say "Please join us" that implies you're paying, in my opinion.

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  • RJmargo
    Master May 2016
    RJmargo ·
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    I wouldn't put it on the wedding website. That would make me think it was hosted. I would spread the info by word of mouth and text. Just tell people that you will be hanging out at bar XYZ on Saturday night and if they are able to, they should swing by. Keep the wording super informal.

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  • Deepsoul
    Devoted April 2016
    Deepsoul ·
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    Call it a "pre wedding hangout" inform the guest this is a non hosted event and want to gather for a pre wedding stress relief! make the posting kind of fun and quirky!

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  • R
    VIP September 2015
    Rosie9615 ·
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    Honestly, I wouldn't expect a pre wedding event to be hosted unless it was a RD. We had a get together at a bar and put it on our website. I wouldn't make people RSVP - that makes it seem like it might be hosted. Just try to get a verbal guesstimate.

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  • Elizabeth
    Master December 2016
    Elizabeth ·
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    You have to say that you and your fiance are going to such and such if anyone wants to join you. DO NOT make a wedding event unless you're hosting. DO NOT ask for RSVPs unless you're hosting. Anything more than just a word-of-mouth "we're going to grab a bite at XXXX if you guys want to swing by" is going to imply that you're hosting.

    Alternatively, you could do an after-wedding get-together there too. Again, word of mouth "husband and I are going to XXXX to hang out for a bit after the reception."

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  • Lynnie
    WeddingWire Administrator October 2016
    Lynnie ·
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    I would not ask for RSVPs if you will not be hosting. I know you are trying to be considerate to the restaurant, but if could cause confusing on who is paying for your guests! I'd include it on your wedding website and say something very casual like "for those who will already be in town, the bride and groom will be hanging out at ______ the night before the wedding at this time and would love it if you swung by!" or something like that Smiley smile

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  • shessica
    Dedicated April 2016
    shessica ·
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    Thank you for the advice, everyone! I'm going to casually include it on a "Things to Do" page on our website as well as use word of mouth. Thanks, again!

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