K
Just Said Yes June 2019

Non-binary friend in wedding

KChow, on January 19, 2019 at 2:35 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 8
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My friend (and member of my bridal party) just recently came out to me as non-binary. I’m super supportive but concerned about protecting them from family and friends of mine who might not understand. Also I want them to feel comfortable but want to experience my wedding without worrying about them the whole time. Any ideas on how to minimize awkwardness?

8 Comments

Latest activity by MrsD, on January 21, 2019 at 1:10 PM
  • Tina
    VIP March 2020
    Tina ·
    • Flag

    Is your friend wearing a dress like the rest of the bridal party or a suit? Are they going to stand out in a way that is different? Otherwise I would think there really isnt a need to be that concerned. People who don't know them you introduce them as any other friend. "This is my friend, ___. I've known them a long time and am so happy that that they are here today." I would think most people making small talk would be more interested in work, hobbies, tv shows they watch etc, than their sexuality. But perhaps Im more open minded than most.

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  • Clarissa
    Rockstar October 2021
    Clarissa ·
    • Flag
    I would hope that your family wouldn’t single you’re friend out and that all conversation would be centered around you and dear husband. Don’t stress yourself out about what if’s.
    • Reply
  • Sunshine
    Expert January 2019
    Sunshine ·
    • Flag
    I don’t see what would be awkward about it, is there anything specific you’re concerned about?
    • Reply
  • EM
    Master April 2017
    EM ·
    • Flag
    What awkwardness? If you don’t make an issue out of it I highly doubt anyone else will.
    • Reply
  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
    • Flag
    The words " my friend" are all people need to hear from you, not about your friend's ( or anyone's) sexual orientation or gender ID. The rest is in how your friend behaves toward others. Most people do not bring very personal things up in casual social conversation with new acquaintances. Nothing for you to worry about.
    • Reply
  • N
    Expert August 2019
    N ·
    • Flag
    Are they going to be glaringly standing out in some way? If not, it should be fine.
    • Reply
  • Rebecca
    Master August 2019
    Rebecca ·
    • Flag

    My best friend is trans and will be standing up with me as part of my party.

    Simply use your friend's pronouns and correct name, and continue to be the friend you always have. At the wedding, do the exact same thing. As others have mentioned, do ask what kind of clothes they would be more comfortable in, and adapt accordingly.

    Introduce as "my friend, *name*, *pronoun* and I met..." or some other anecdote.

    Anyone who is rude about it is showing their own rear end far more than anything else.

    By having your friend's back, you will be doing more for them than anything else.

    • Reply
  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
    • Flag

    I'd just talk to them. Are they worried about awkwardness at the wedding? I'm not sure if anyone would really care anyway?

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