No speeches

We do not want speeches/toasts at all but all the wedding sites and forums say they are required/expected. In our families and social circles, speeches/toasts are not done so I have never heard any as a guest. No one has ever once said “the food was great, the couple was happy, the dancing was fun but what ruined everything was no toasts”. Even the odd person we know who has been to a wedding as a guest that had speeches said they prefer them to be skipped entirely. Though they are common on YouTube and wedding videography sites and feel awkward and uncomfortable, so many people don’t want them but they feel pressured anyway, which should not happen. If you don’t want something, your guests and vendors need to fully respect that.


As a guest, I have never heard or seen the couple give a thank you speech at the reception because that is what the receiving line or dismissing the rows after the ceremony to greet everyone is for. Talk to your dj and coordinator to make sure the reception flows so there isn’t any awkward gap.

We’re not allowing any speeches or toasts at our wedding and I don’t think anyone will miss them. I think my FH’s dad wants to give one, but I think wedding speeches are just tend to be awkward and unnecessary,

I was just married this past Friday. There were no speeches (groomsmen afraid of public speaking). My father gave a quick blessing before the meal which consisted of two jokes and a line about blessing the marriage and food.

The only complaint was from my husband's uncle who told us later he had a poem he wanted to recite (family tradition to write crazy poems that are campy and contain to many inside jokes from his generation) we are glad we didn't do toasts!!!!

We are planning to do the same thing as you. Avoiding speeches but my FH and I will make a champagne toast and thank everyone for being there.

We won’t be doing speeches at our reception either.

We had no speeches. No one missed them.

View Quoted Comment I feel you! And after seeing some fumbles, the stress it can cause people making the speech, etc. we feel the same!

View Quoted Comment Congrats!!! And good Intel, thank you

View Quoted Comment Sounds like a great plan to me

We also don’t want first dances! Lol. A giant dinner party is what we’re going for, I suppose

We’re doing toasts at the rehearsal dinner, and then we’re going to do a quick thank you/welcome toast between the cocktail hour and dinner.

Your wedding. Your rules. If anyone complains, tell them when they offer to help pay the bills, then they can help make the rules. Do not feel bad. This is your day!

Not having speeches has actually become very common these days. In the past five years, I’d say about half the weddings I’ve attended have not had speeches. FH and I are not having speeches at our reception either. We will make a brief toast to thank everyone for coming, and that’s it!

The only speeches I remember from weddings are the cringey ones! FH wants his best man to give a toast and my maid of honor is up for one too, but we gave them the "short, sweet, and to the point" guidelines. I would've been totally fine with no speeches/toasts in general, though, and I don't think any of our guests would be disappointed if there weren't any.

I hate speeches as well!! Every time there are speeches, I completely zone out lol

We're also doing a welcome/thanks toast at the start of the reception and don't want any more speeches. I know that my Man of Honor doesn't want to do one and I'm completely fine with it, the other one won't do one either because it would look weird and I think he is relieved. We've actually put info on our website to sign up to our MoHs if anyone wants to make a speech - because of technical issues and so that there are microphones on hand... Aaaand we will use this opportunity to cancel any speeches with too much cringe potential, like the one that FHs uncle is apparently planning... He's even been asking my friends for embarrassing details from my teenage years, like ??? So these are just going to get "forgotten".

I had prepped everyone for months including my now-husband that there will be no speeches, so we can have more band time. But gosh darnit, in the days preceding they were so charming that I gave the okay to my wedding planner to allow it. I let my Dad, MOH, and BM talk. It was sweet and personal, but be forewarned it is not polite to eat when someone is speaking to you. And because of this, I barely touched my meal. Oh well. I have memories.

We aren’t allowing speeches either because after a few drinks you never know what is going to be said. I don’t think people will miss them at all.