No one under 18 at our wedding except...

How many exceptions does that actually end up being and how many kids are excluded? I totally understand the wedding party and immediate family being included, but I think when you also start including out of town people it can get a little blurred.

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I think like 4 excluded, 2 exception out of 25 of my fiance's 1st cousins.

then like 1 excluded, 10 exceptions on my side because all of my family is from out of state/country.

our reasoning was that with his local cousins they can find babysitters or whatever for the night. Whereas when our family from out of state/country are probably coming for the week or longer that would be more difficult to leave those kids behind.

I personally think your exceptions are reasonable. International traveling definitely makes a difference!

View Quoted Comment So all kids but 5?
Sorry but I'd be mad. Your request sounds reasonable but will not look reasonable. I fear you will have some explaining to do post wedding.

Edit
I mean if it's cutting 5 kids I would encourage them to hire babysitters but invite them anyway since so many children will be there

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Not necessarily kids they are like young teenagers. And majority of them except 1 are 21 and up.

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Thanks for your input! I think so too! If people want to spend the time and money to come to our wedding overseas then of course we would have them!

Mine will be 21+ except for f and Immediate family which ends up only being 5 kids anyway not a big deal isn't a big deal. Other than that no kids, I feel bad but at the end of the day A) not in the budget as I am already at 150 people and B) I do not want kids running around it is an adults event. Plus I figured if I start making exceptions they wont stop.

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Thats a good idea,

we're still playing around with what we want to do and we're not getting married till sept 2020 anyways so a lot can change. But at the end of the day i'm sure if people could afford it they would invite everyone, like we would but we can't. I don't really care for little ones to be there but their parents i would want to be there and i know for some of them they could not leave their kids behind in another state/country.

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It really is the only way if not we would be at about 185 with children, plus they change the atmosphere when parent spend more time chasing after them then enjoying themselves.

View Quoted Comment 21+ aren’t kids (or teenagers) so they don’t fall under the “no kids” rule. Do they all still live at home? I totally get having to cut the guest list down- we’re staying around 65 max. Most advice is to invite in circles, all aunts and uncles, all cousins, etc, but to me it’s more about having the people we’re closest too. I’m close to some of my cousins and others I haven’t heard from in years, so obviously they aren’t on the list. That said, I would be offended if I was the one person with a kid (under 17) who wasn’t invited even though your exceptions make sense from a logic standpoint.

View Quoted Comment Understandable! Yeah I wish we could be about “inviting who we’re close with” but our families are too big and people would get offended

Other than the 4 IN the wedding we have NO CHILDREN. I’m NOT the “bad guy” with anyone as the wedding/reception is in a Casino, & Resort.
My opinion is to have a sitter available if need be.

I think that your request is reasonable. I don’t agree with the argument that it’s unfair for local guests to pay for babysitters, & let OOT guests bring kids. OOT guests are paying for flights, & hotels, & don’t usually know anyone in the area for a babysitter. A local guests usually know people in the area & doesn’t have to pay for hotel & airfare.

We cut all kids except for the ones in the wedding party: FH's nephews and my bridesmaid's daughter who is my flower girl. All of our friends and family have kids ranging from 6 months to 12 years by the time we get married and that was going to start cause some problems.

The only unspoken exception to this will be my FH's godson who is on the autism spectrum. We wanted to give his parents as many options as possible.

So we are also having no kids, except breastfeeding moms and my future step-son who will be 16 and a friend of his so he won't get board. A lot of our friends who we already told them about no kids at the wedding are very excited to have a quote-unquote date night kid free! My fiance's best man was asked if he wanted to bring his daughter and he said nope she's staying home we are going to get wasted...lol!

View Quoted Comment Exactly! Out of town people would pay SO much money to go to our wedding which wouldn’t even be comparable to what we would pay for their food drink etc for them. And besides anyone that we cut off are like teenagers that don’t even need baby sitters, we just couldn’t afford to have everyone there especially teenagers we weren’t close with

View Quoted Comment Agreed. One of my best friends, is traveling from down south w/ her kids & bf - but her family lives in my area. Early on I asked if she wanted to bring the kids & she was like nope, we are dating this as a date night. My mom, brother & grandmother gets to enjoy our kids this weekend. And I explained the kid problem & she was like yeah, I’m unique, since I’m traveling & have so much family in the area, but if I was traveling for the weekend I could understand having to bring kids.


Don't get me wrong, I don’t want kids. But if someone from my FH family contacts me & say that they want to join us (they live across the country) than I’m going to accommodate them & let them bring their kids. After all I’m marrying into his family & it’s more than a single day.

I personally would just cut them all. Sort of like all or none type of deal. But I can see your reasoning behind oot guests especially ones in the wedding party