No late entry to wedding?

Since you’re not worried about being rude, I don’t see why “no entry after 6:30 pm” doesn’t work.

May be a lot for the invitation, could always put it on your wedding website faq page. You also have to think about how to enforce it, will you have someone watching the entrance?

View Quoted Comment I guess I just don’t like the way it sounds lol. But I guess it would work 🤷‍♀️

Just invite them to the dance?

View Quoted Comment I’m planning on putting it on our “reception card” in our invitation suite. The reception card has the time for when seating begins for the reception/dinner and when dinner actually begins. We will have security. Honestly if people get in after 6:30 it’s not a huge deal, I just want them to know that I personally have a problem with them showing up after all the “wedding stuff”. And maybe it’ll scare them into showing up before 6:30. 😅

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Yeah I think that's the right move, unfortunate it even has to be said!

View Quoted Comment My venue won’t allow it. So we’ll have to pay for their food and seat for the reception whether they show up to eat and sit, or not.

If you are not worried about being rude a FH doesn’t mind either say it as it is! Some people are disrespectful and the only way for them to understand is to let them know directly and straight

You're being awfully considerate already by simply inviting them at all! I already put my foot down with my parents about them inviting people to the wedding. The rules are:

If neither FH nor I have spoken to them in more than five years - NOT INVITED

If FH has never met them - NOT INVITED

If inviting them means people we want to invite don't get to come - NOT INVITED

If I don't like them personally or think they'll start drama - NOT INVITED

Also, KIDS are NOT INVITED!!!

Do they still give gifts? And are they preventing someone you care about coming or will they Disturb your day? (Like over drinking or partying too hard)

I had a friend flat out tell me ceremonies are boring af and didn’t want to go. I’m not one to have a long one and was kind of hurt. I’m hesitating inviting her cause of that.

View Quoted Comment I love these rules of yours!

View Quoted Comment Makes things easier if you have a basic set and stick to 'em!

Honestly, I hate the approach of saying something to everyone, when it's really only directed at a few people. It's very passive-aggressive, and if these people are so rude as to typically show up for important events hours late, you putting a threat on your invitations/website/wherever is NOT likely to change their behavior. But, it potentially makes you look like kind of a jerk to guests who would never dream of not showing up on time. I would not put anything about a "no late entry policy," anywhere. Instead, I'd either ask FMIL to call these guests directly and talk with them about the expectation that they will show up on time or ask them to please decline the invitation, or if she doesn't want to do that or doesn't think it will make a difference, I'd drop them from the guest list. Either of those options deals with the issue directly, rather than making potentially vague/rude threats to all your guests, and has a better chance of actually dealing with the problem.

View Quoted Comment When it comes to etiquette in general, THIS post is right, I think. You need not be gracious to someone when they are doing something bad, or if they are famous for it and you want to prevent a reoccurrence. But don't put notices ( no jeans, no coming late, whatever) on invitations or websites where everyone is somewhat insulted, " any child knows that". Do the invitations and websites and programs in a way that they are polite to all reasonable people. For people who have to be told, do not do anything appropriate, go to them personally, and tell them. What is the worst, that because you are calling them out for something they have done over and over, they will be insulted and not come? You would not be giving them a lecture if blameless. So do not go overboard ( OP wisely said, not attending whole ceremony okay provided they attend whole reception, is fair and reasonable. Go to a theatre, concert by a top symphony, taping of a TV show. You are seated before the first thing . If late, stand and wait outside or elsewhere til the first part is over, then you may join other patrons or guests. But if you are not right there at entry time, before part 2 , you are shut out for the night. Address the expected offenders. The have forfeited your gracious expectation that of course they will behave. Because everyone in the family knows, they don't. So set down the rules. Say if they cannot arrive either before the ceremony, or by the time doors open for dinner, do not bother to come. Talk directly to the expected offenders. And assume other people do not need to read through a bunch of dress and behavioral no-nos really directed at a small few. Your elegant and classy affair, to the majority of guests, starts with how you as hosts behave, starting with the invitation. So only the troublesome ones should see or hear necessary discussion of their behavior. Everyone else should see and hear the polite form. Or, what I would do, don't invite them.. tell his mom, since FI does not particularly want them, and does not care if they feel slighted, they will not be invited. There is no need to. It is your wedding, not hers, and you would not have put these rarely seen extended family on the list.

Tell her that you'll invite these people she's insisting on but that she's going to have to pay for them.

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Yes, this! Great advice.

I agree with others. MIL can pay for it and if they come late, so be it. Lots of people don’t show for ceremony and as long as the primary people show, who cares about them showing up?

We are having our guests meet us somewhere so we can lead them to the venue. That way we have zero unexpected guests and if someone shows up late they're S.O.L. not my problem. You were told when to be at the meeting place and if you're not there within 30 or so minutes you're gonna miss it. Tough cookies.

I've always just put "please try to arrive on time" . I totally see your idea on this because people come soooooo late sometimes

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I agree with this, tell FMIL that the venue will be instructed to gather up the escort cards of any people who did not make it to dinner and will give them to you after the reception. If any of those relatives are among them, she will owe you guys the money for them, since she is insisting on inviting them. Either she will let you cut them from the list, or you will have that security blanket going into it!