No kiddos at our wedding

We're only having immediate family bring their children since my FH has 4 brothers and they're all groomsmen, plus my family is out of the country so they have no choice but the bring their kids. None of them are babies though, so that's why we're fine with them being at the ceremony because we know they won't bother anyone.

This is a FH problem. It's his brother, so he needs to talk to him and get some backbone and stand his ground. If you don't want babies there, then you don't want babies there. Point. Blank. Period. It sucks, but his wife may just have to not attend if they're not willing to let the grandparents watch their child. If he doesn't do it himself, then you're going to have to be the one to enforce your rule and stand firm in your decision.

Yes, perhaps that is the reality of a working mom, but a wedding isn't a job, either, and you shouldn't expect your guests to treat it as if they're having to go to work. Yikes.

As a child-free-forever person, I am usually of the "absolutely no kids" camp, but I must agree with a previous poster: new babies are typically an exception.

And while I also agree that I don't know why someone would want to bring such a young infant to an event where there will be germs, germs, germs everywhere, all etiquette will tell you it is in poor form to tell a new mom to leave her baby behind.

Looking up any true etiquette professional says "babies should always be invited" and that the onus is then on the parents to handle it correctly (leave the ceremony if baby cries, leave the event early, etc.) So my suggestion would be to tell them you expect that they will be respectful and will remove themselves if baby becomes a problem. That would generally inform anyone with a bit of common sense that if baby is very fussy, they should elect to sit the event out.