"No gifts please" etiquette

Are you adamantly against having people donate to a charity/organization in your name? People will want to get you something, so might as well put it to good use; and that way you have more to say than just "no presents." If you went that route, I like " While we have everything we need, not everyone does -- in lieu of gifts, donations may be made to So&So Foundation [, which does this and that]. But, truly, your presence is present enough!" If I got invited to a no presents wedding, I would still make a donation in the couple's name, but they just wouldn't get to pick the recipient. I think the thought of showing up completely empty handed to a wedding - figuratively speaking - wouldn't sit right with most people.

@FutureMrsT that was beautifully stated!!! We are an older couple, both of us a first marriage, but have been living together for several years, and I have 2 adult children from a previous relationship when I was much younger. I feel funny having a bridal shower (my MOH/best friend insists I should have one - but I'm not even thinking of registering anywhere, so I don't know what she could plan??) - I just feel funny about gifts at our age and our status in life. We aren't starting out. Traditionally, wedding gifts were for the couple starting out and setting up a home. I am floored by what you wrote Future ...

I wouldn't put it on the invitation; i'd handle it the same as asking for cash; word of mouth. I'm not a fan of being told where to donate, no matter how graciously it's worded. You can have your relatives/friends just use the suggestion from Future, but tell them to pick their own charity.