No cocktail hour

At my 1st wedding, we had a cocktail hour with passed hors d'oeuvres. It's important to keep your guests entertained in the hour when the wedding party takes photos. If you are trying to save money, consider toning it down by offering fewer options, such as beer and wine but no hard liquor, and stationary hors d'ouevres set up buffet style on a long table instead of passed ones with servers.

If y'all do pictures after will you and your bridal party just not eat?

We've been discussing whether or not to have a real cocktail hour or not too

You can't have guests start dinner without you. If you are doing anything after the ceremony without guests, you need something for them to do i.e. eat and drink.

No, our party is very small (2 people on each side) so it wouldn't take long to get photos done if we decide to take pictures afterwards.

I honestly think it's a nice time for them to mingle, for you to take photos, and a good bridge between the ceremony and the formal dinner. It doesn't have to be elaborate or long, but it feels a little abrupt to go right in, sit down and eat.....

Could they start with the salad?

Cocktail hour fills that gap when you are having pictures taken. Even if you do a first look, there are pics that can't be taken until after the ceremony and they take a certain amount of time.

Do you really plan on your guests starting dinner without you? What time is your ceremony?

ETA No, they can't start with the salad. Guests don't start eating before the hosts are at the table.

Are you trying to avoid the expense of a cocktail hour?

FutureMrs.Scott, I'm having problems imagining your timeline. Ceremony then right to dinner?

No, they should not eat without you. It's weird if the guests of honor are late to the party. Have a cheese/cracker tray if you think you won't be long.

I agree with @celia maybe shorten it and do a cocktail half hour?

Ok, half hour sounds like a good idea. Ceremony and reception are the same location and we're planning on starting at 6p.

We're going to have to do a cocktail hour because FH absolutely refuses to do a "first look" (my cute traditional boy is set on the first time he sees me in the dress being when I walk down the aisle). If we were doing pictures beforehand, we wouldn't bother. But I want the food I'm paying for and refuse to not eat at my own wedding. So cocktail hour will happen with some appetizers. Plus, since we're doing a buffet, it will allow people to grab drinks and find a place to sit before it's time to eat dinner.

You really should not skip dinner at your own wedding. I get that it's common for the couple not to get the chance to eat, but that's not healthy. Especially if you're too nervous in the morning to eat.

I assume you want to forego cocktail hour because of budget? I would think it's odd to walk into a wedding and be immediately fed my salad. As Celia said, it's often a time to mingle, say hello to people you don't get to say hi to before the wedding, grab and drink and find your seat. You could do a shorter time period 30 or 45 mins if pictures won't take that long. But I think you need time for people to trickle in and find where they are seated.

I also think most people will find it weird to eat without the couple present.

If you are having a first look and taking pictures afterwards, you can forgo the cocktail hour.

If you are doing pictures after the ceremony, you will need to do a cocktail hour to fill that gap of time for your guests.

If you get rid of cocktail hour and take pictures after the ceremony, your guests will have their dinner and expect to be entertained with an intro, dances, and other traditional wedding reception staples which will leave you with very little time for you and your bridal party to eat. And last time I checked, eating is important.

Hmm.. I don't think I've every been to a wedding without one. I agree with at least doing a half hour. Personally I love cocktail hour, no matter how minimal.

I also had a small bridal party just like you, and we took pictures before the ceremony, but having the cocktail hour really helped. We also took photos during cocktail hour with our families ... you'd be surprised how quickly the time goes by while taking pictures. We thought that since we took pictures beforehand that we'd be able to just hang out and enjoy cocktails and appetizers with our guests after taking some family photos, but we were pretty much taking pictures the entire time.

What about you and your bridal party? Will there be enough time to eat after pictures since your guests will have already started? I am not sure how much time you will need for pictures but based on weddings I have been in, we have always needed around a hour - which means in order for you and the BP to get food you will need about 1.5 hours for dinner. Also will you be doing family pictures? That'll add additional time. If you decide to wait on serving dinner until pictures are complete, you should provide your guests with food and drink during that time (cocktail hour).

We are having a cocktail hour but we have decided to do a first look and knock out our BP pictures prior to the ceremony. Majority of our family will also already be at the venue (either in the BP or getting ready on site) so we are planning to get those done in advance as well - the only pictures post ceremony will be with our grandparents and our pictures taken at sundown that only involve the bride and groom. We really wanted to enjoy our cocktail hour and eat dinner with our guests.

Cocktail hours in NJ are the best part..... I've only ever seen them eliminated at very small weddings when appetizer platters were served at each table. Not as effective IMHO....

@Alli I personally don't think that games have a place at a wedding but to each their own. Regardless of what you do, your guests should still have food and beverages available to them during that hour - even if they are consuming them while watching a slideshow and playing a game.