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Dedicated December 2019

No bridesmaids: who did what?

isabel1115, on March 19, 2019 at 9:09 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 6

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Anyone else who didn't have bridesmaids: I am wondering: did you do everything yourselves or delegate tasks in other ways?

I chose not to have bridesmaids mostly to avoid drama, not have to choose between my friends, and focus on family. Most of my friends and I have had at least one bad bridesmaid experience each.

For the most part, this has helped but there are some things that traditionally bridesmaids do and I'm not sure who will do them/which I will cut now so wondering what other wedding party-less people did.

Who did you get ready with?

Who did you go dress shopping with?

Who threw your bridal shower and bachelorette or did you not have one?

Who was your moral support?

I have my mom, relatives and a few friends who have offered to help with some of these aspects but wondering what others did.

A part of me kind of feels like I gave up my opportunity to do some of these things when I chose not to have a wedding party. The loneliest part is feeling like I gave up the "privilege" to talk to friends for moral support. My FH logged into WW the other day and noticed I was using it more. I told him because I peruse the message boards sometimes looking for advice since I have no one to talk to. When I was stressed over dress shopping, I posted on here.

After I said that, he has really made a point to make sure I feel like we are in it together which has been great but yeah...wondering what other wedding party-less people did with some of these things the FH and WW community couldn't do!

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6 Comments

Latest activity by Casey, on March 20, 2019 at 3:27 PM

Master May 2020
Tara · on March 19, 2019 at 9:22 PM
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I opted out of having bridesmaids for the same reasons you listed. I plan to get ready with my mom and sister helping. I ordered my dress online. I didn’t have a bridal shower nor a bachelorette party. My moral support is my family.
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Legend March 2017
Pirate & 60s Bride · on March 19, 2019 at 9:52 PM
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I didn’t have any. No regrets!

* I preferred to mostly go dress shopping myself but did one trip with mom/sis and one trip with mom/friend
* Two friends invited me & my mom to a Fancy Tea & Sandwiches bridal shower. So sweet!
* Mom & sis got ready with me—fun and low stress

Had I gotten married in my 20’s I would have had the BMs and parties. But now I have several & different groups of very busy friends. I just wanted everyone to make it to my wedding! Plus, as a BM the costs and obligations kinda suck so I didn’t think my friends would miss it. 😁 My hubby & I were 50/50 partners so he was my fantastic moral support!
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VIP August 2019
Tamara · on March 19, 2019 at 10:10 PM
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I am not having bridesmaids either and did a lot of the planning and shopping with my mom, sisters, and niece. On the day of they will help me to get ready, so all should be well....crossing fingers. This site has also been priceless whenever I had a question or was in doubt about something. It's also been great to see what amazing things everyone is doing. Most importantly, I can talk about wedding stuff until my head pops off without anyone being bored with me. Lol!
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Dedicated May 2019
Maybride2019 · on March 19, 2019 at 10:39 PM
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Only person standing with us will be my 9yr old daughter and she is only standing for the first part of the ceremony. We wanted to avoid drama and stress at all cost so we went without a wedding party. No bridal shower or bachelor/bachelorette parties, instead we will be having a dinner get together with 10 or so of the people that r closest to us 2 weeks before the wedding. My 19 and 9yr old daughters and my very good friend will be getting ready with me. FHs best friend and the husband of my good friend will both be helping him day of.
FH is my ear for all wedding talk. He makes himself available to be at all times for wedding planning. My good friend has stepped up within the last 2 months when she realized FH and I were doing everything ourselves. She has been amazing with suggestions and offering her help. Honestly not having a bunch of people involved in our planning process and for our actual day has eliminated alot of stress.
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Legend July 2019
MrsD · on March 20, 2019 at 3:15 PM
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I have bridesmaids, so this is just my experience from people who we have been to their weddings and they didn't have a bridal party.
Who did you get ready with? Usually moms or siblings or 1 best friend.
Who did you go dress shopping with? Same as above.
Who threw your bridal shower and bachelorette or did you not have one? They didn't have either.
Who was your moral support? Fiance & parents.
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Super December 2021
Casey · on March 20, 2019 at 3:27 PM
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Originally I was not going to have any bridal party. Now I'm having my sister be maid of honor but basically this is a title, she will still get to sit and she has no duties.
I went dress shopping with my mother, future MIL, my grandmother, and my sister. There ended up being some drama with my dress, and the second time I went it was just me and my mother.
I am planning on getting ready with just my mom and my sister (which I was already planning to do regardless of whether I gave my sister the MOH title.)
I am not planning on having either of these parties, my mother was hinting at throwing me one because my sister just wouldn't be able to, but I don't really have anyone to invite so I don't think she will. This is fine because I never expected either, don't really care, and (as I said) I just don't have any close friends who line in town who could come.
My fiance and mother are my biggest moral support, and my sister and a few friends who live out of town.
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