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Kell
Super March 2021

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Kell, on July 30, 2020 at 3:59 AM Posted in Planning 0 16
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Hi Everyone,

I'm new here.

What is the best advice you've been given about wedding planning?

16 Comments

Latest activity by Leslie, on July 31, 2020 at 12:25 AM
  • Rebecca
    Rockstar August 2019
    Rebecca ·
    • Flag

    Hi and welcome!

    My first piece of advice is to create an email JUST for the wedding stuff.

    You're going to get spammed to your eyebrows, so if you only give out the wedding specific email, you can direct that firehose elsewhere. Also, if both of you have access to it, that makes planning easier.

    My second piece is to remember that this is about the two of you. Do what is right for the two of you, don't let anyone else throw drama about it, and it'll turn out fine.

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  • Kell
    Super March 2021
    Kell ·
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    Wow, Rebecca!

    That's great advice about the e-mail address. Thank you!

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  • KiwiDerbyBride
    VIP May 2015
    KiwiDerbyBride ·
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    View Quoted Comment

    I second this! My advice:

    - have the wedding you can afford, without counting on money from anyone else. If parents want to contribute, awesome, but don’t count on it.

    - second to that, if someone offers money, don’t count on it until it’s actually in your bank account. Too many stories on this forum of couples who have been promised money so paid deposits on things, then the money didn’t appear and they were stuck with greater expense they couldn’t afford.

    -

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  • Erin
    Expert August 2020
    Erin ·
    • Flag
    RSVPs!! Either come up with a number system or fill out the names on each one so when they return it, you’ll know exactly who it is! We received back quite a few without any names on them and it was quite stressful to figure out who they were.
    • Reply
  • Margaret
    Rockstar October 2020
    Margaret ·
    • Flag

    Aside from those listed already;

    I'd start a budget and put extra into that budge and increase it about 20-25% - And follow your budget timeline.

    Create a planner that works for your dream wedding. I customized my own planner as we were doing a DW and be ready to be fluid with changes or bumps in the road.

    Understand that while you want other people to help you, at the end of the day the planning and preparations are yours and your FHs responsibility ONLY - do not set the expectation that your MOH, BM, family will be on top of things like you are.

    Congratulations and Happy Planning.

    • Reply
  • Kristi
    Savvy June 2021
    Kristi ·
    • Flag

    Welcome!! I'm pretty new here too. All of the above... plus... be prepared to encounter more stressful situations & "unknowns" under the current conditions with all the Covid related issues. Seems the world changes daily now, so wedding planning is absolutely different.

    • Reply
  • Yasmine
    Rockstar October 2020
    Yasmine ·
    • Flag

    You don't have to follow "tradition". It's your wedding, do whatever you want with it!

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  • B
    Expert July 2017
    Becky ·
    • Flag

    All of the above - plus -

    1 - It's your FS's wedding too - he/she/they should be helping you and have meaningful input

    2 - "No" is a complete sentence

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  • Katie
    Expert August 2021
    Katie ·
    • Flag
    The best advice I have received was from my coworkers. They said have the wedding you want and f everyone's feelings. It's your day and if it was their day do you really think they would care about you on their day. They said because when it comes to weddings you can't invite everyone and you can't have all your friends in the wedding party. So there will be people who are going to have hurt feelings. People will call you a bridezilla when they were exactly the same way. And lastly people are going to try and talk you into having your wedding the way they think you should have it just take their advice with a grain of salt. Remember it's your special day not theirs so forget about everyone's feelings and have the wedding you and your fiance want.
    • Reply
  • Sarah
    Expert August 2020
    Sarah ·
    • Flag
    Re: covid wedding planning...


    “Life is what happens when you’re busy making plans. Cherish the moment and don’t sweat the small stuff”
    • Reply
  • Super August 2020
    ·
    • Flag
    Advice I was given: Do what you and your partner want and don't worry about what anyone else* wants, it's not about them.

    Things I've learned/done:
    *·These people mean, "do what you and your partner want...as long as it's also what I want for you." Remember that, "it's not about them," still applies to the person giving the advice.

    ·In addition to the email address, make a shared Google drive, so you can keep all of your contracts and guest lists together somewhere that's easy to access, and you can both write down random thoughts/ideas/vows whenever they come to you and you'll always be able to find them.
    ·This is related to the first thing, but whenever you're deciding whether or not to do something, ask yourselves, "is this meaningful to us?" If the answer is no, you probably don't need to do it.
    ·Money=/=power in this situation. If someone wants to contribute, that's great, but unless you agree to strings when you accept the money, they don't get to decide how you spend it.
    ·Have a backup plan! That's probably more of a 2020 lesson than a wedding planning one, but whatever you do, go into it with the understanding that it may not work out exactly the way you imagined, but at the end of the day, you'll still be just as married even if it looks a little bit different.
    • Reply
  • Melle
    Rockstar June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    Keep it simple is the best advice I was given aha. We get so fixated on details and what not and it just adds more time and stress and money and planning into our plates
    • Reply
  • Monica
    Devoted August 2021
    Monica ·
    • Flag
    I found this advice really helpful: Pick the top 3 things that are most important to you in the wedding and have your FS do the same. Spend more to get what you want in those areas and cut elsewhere on things that are not as important to you.


    For example, my fiance and I both didn't really care about the cake. I just want it to taste good but other than that it's not as important to me. So instead of spending hundreds on a traditional fancy cake, we are just doing a sheet cake and cutting and serving that. Saving us so much money to use on things we did care more about.
    • Reply
  • Nicole
    Rockstar September 2020
    Nicole ·
    • Flag
    One of the greatest pieces of advice when planning is to remember that while this may be one of the most important days in your and your FS’s lives, it’s just another day for everyone else. They’ll be happy for you, but they’ll never care as much as you and your FS. Temper your expectations of other people in regards to planning and plan your day with your FS. It’s his/her special day as well!
    • Reply
  • Katie
    Expert August 2021
    Katie ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    This is really good advice. With all the stress and joy of planning sometimes you do forget that to everyone else it is just another day.
    • Reply
  • L
    Super October 2020
    Leslie ·
    • Flag

    Budget first. Then know it’s easy to go over the price. Figure out where you want to spend. I wanted great pictures and video so I spent $$ on it but very little on flowers, invites, etc. as I don’t think people remember. Don’t get caught in all the hype you see. You don’t need a them but if you want one do it. Work with your partner for the vision you two want. And then stick to your guns. Don’t let your mom sister or whenever push you in a different direction. I personally would also say less is more when it comes to your bridal party. I see too much drama on here from bridesmaids and some groomsmen. But if you always wanted than have 20.

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