Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

Expert March 2021

Need to Vent!

Nikki, on June 7, 2019 at 10:12 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 10

Saved

Flag
Hide content

So I recently was speaking to my grandma about sending save the dates and invites since the wedding will be at their house. I have specifically told her to keep our guest count down we are only sending/inviting friends and family that have have had an impact on lives or at least been in our lives. My grandma tells me today that she has spoke to her cousin and told her that she is invited and should be receiving a save the date and invite to the wedding soon. Save the dates just went out on Wednesday. I hardly now this cousin I may have meet her 1 time. I’m not worried that she will show up as she never comes to anything but it’s frustrating that my grandma and spoken about this cousin and told her how we felt. I feel like my grandma did not even listen to me on how I was inviting people. Now I’m obligated to send the save the date because she is expecting one. She did the same thing to my sister. Just super frustrating.

Vent over!

Flag
Hide content

10 Comments

Latest activity by Melissa, on June 8, 2019 at 5:29 PM

VIP September 2019
latasha · on June 7, 2019 at 10:16 PM
Flag

Hide content
Most people plan almost a year out so I think you are right on track. I had 17 months and I still feel like that wasn’t enough time lol
- Reply
Champion November 2016
LB · on June 7, 2019 at 10:22 PM
Flag

Hide content
I think this is a result of having your venue be your grandmother's property. She probably feels since it's her place she has allowance to invite who she wants. Nothing you can really do unless you want to move the wedding somewhere else. This is one of the consequences of using someone's property to host your wedding.
- Reply
Legend June 2019
Melle · on June 7, 2019 at 10:28 PM
Flag

Hide content
Oh girl I know what you feel!!! Because my dad did that to me. They don't necessarily think that we plan it by person -__- and that it kind of ruins our plans when they just add people so easily like that. My dad was like "oh forgot to mention this lady is probably bringing a plus one too" why didn't you say it to me before... INVITES ALREADY SENT FOR ONE PERSON ONLY. But hey it's ok things will work out, you'll expect some no RSVPs in the end and people to change their RSVPs later.
- Reply
Master December 2019
Cher Horowitz · on June 7, 2019 at 10:33 PM
Flag

Hide content
Unfortunately, as PP said, your grandma probably feels she can invite whoever since it's her house. The only solution I can think of is talking to your grandma again about guest count. Explain you'd love to celebrate with everyone, but your budget only allows for so much. Hope this helps a little, and good luck!
- Reply
VIP September 2019
latasha · on June 7, 2019 at 11:05 PM
Flag

Hide content
I don’t know why on my end it’s showing the first comment....being from me lol. I posted that to another forum!! Anyway I feel like that is super frustrating but if you aren’t close to this cousin I still wouldn’t send her a STD.
- Reply
VIP September 2019
CDickman · on June 8, 2019 at 12:33 AM
Flag

Hide content
To be fair your grandma is letting you have a wedding at her house. Saves my you s ton on venue. I think it is fair she can invite her cousin.
- Reply
VIP June 2019
Formerbride · on June 8, 2019 at 6:29 AM
Flag

Hide content
Her save the date got lost in the mail... problem solved lol.
- Reply
Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on June 8, 2019 at 7:34 AM
Flag

Hide content
I don't agree with how she went about it, but the wedding is being held at her property. I think it's fair to let her invite one guest, but make sure she knows that's it.
- Reply
Super October 2021
Nicole · on June 8, 2019 at 8:22 AM
Flag

Hide content
I agree with pp's unfortunately since you're having it at her house she feels entitled to invite who she wants. She should have talked to you about it before std's went out, but unfortunately I think you night to invite the cousin out of courtesy because the event is at her house.

Hopefully no other mystery guests pop up!
- Reply

VIP September 2019
Melissa · on June 8, 2019 at 5:29 PM
Flag

Hide content
Since it is her house, I think she should be allowed a guest or 2, but I know the feeling about adding random people. I got a call from FMIL the other day that we need to add FH’s uncle’s mother in law bc they are going on vacation with her and the wedding may come up. 🙄
- Reply