Need some advice and only have a short amount of time to decide

So I posted a few weeks ago about canceling but before it was strictly due to COVID-19. Now I have a new dilemma. It seems to me more problems arising than solutions smh. So my fiancé and I have been saving for our wedding since December 2019. We went through our budget crunches the numbers and found how much we needed to save to have enough to cover every last thing. and we have a pretty nice nest egg, it’s actually the most we’ve ever been able to save (something about a contract that changes the stakes) but my job has recently become sort of unstable. I am a daycare teacher and the day care center and I have been working remotely since March. We just finished the school year and now there is talk about cutting the center. My daycare is part of a college so our mission is providing care to children of full or part time students while they’re in classes but with classes online the college doesn’t see a need for us (and I get that). Their budget has drastically changed and they need to see which departments are expendable and which are necessary. So most of the college workers who fall under a specific payroll have been put on a month by month basis since July. My daycare center used to have us contracted for a year and when the fiscal year was up we would be rehired but now we’ve been receiving a contract per month based on budget. But as the new college year begins this week the college needs to make their final decision about who to keep. My contract is up on the 31st and my directors are discussing furlough with us just in case. My question is should my fiancé and I cancel our June 2021 wedding with job security being so unstable and on a month by month basis when I used to be contracted for an entire school year? We have about a week and a half left on our contract to be in the cancellation window of 750 dollars after September 6th it doubles and becomes 1500 and it just keeps doubling. Does it make sense to keep the wedding? When A. We may not be able to continue saving for it like we have every paycheck. B. if I lose my job I would need my fiancé to step up with my half of rent until I can find a replacement (I have been looking). My next question is even if I find a job and it’s higher paying, with the climate of this country and how businesses are going under and the market down and the country in even more debt, should we just hold on to our money for something else that we’ve also wanted like a new place? We really want this wedding and planning it despite the stress around it in regards to covid, it has been the only bright spot within all the unrest in our country. It’s crazy how the idea of letting go of this wedding makes my heart hurt so much. Call me dramatic but that’s how it feels for me. My fiancé doesn’t want me to cancel because he doesn’t want me to look back with regret especially if everything would have worked out in the end but we cancelled too prematurely but I feel it’s such a risk to wait it out especially when the cancellation fee doubles and we’re trying to save the money if we need it for an emergency fund or to move from our studio apartment. we honestly don’t know which decision to make. I just would like to know before I go through with dress shopping on the fourth. I don’t want to buy a dress and then cancel the wedding. FH says to wait until the end of the month to see what my job decides and I tell him even if they rehire me for next month it would just be for another month and then we will go through this again and with a higher cancellation fee.


I never thought wedding planning would put me into a whole depression. My sleep schedule is off I can barely get four hours before I am wide awake. My appetite is non existent. 2020 has truly done a number on everything in our world and it breaks my heart.
Please send your kind advice because one day the idea of cancelling seems like the best idea then the next day it goes out the window and I want to keep it. It’s the same cycle on a loop.