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Savvy May 2021

Need opinions on family situation

Christina, on July 7, 2019 at 6:15 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 1 5

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My FMI and my mom never got along when going over budget for the wedding. My fiancé and I are contributing the same amount as each family is. SO my FMI refuses to come to my bridal shower due to my mom being there and wants my fiancé and I to navigate future meet ups when both families have to be together...this worries me. Especially since I can’t ‘babysit’ during our wedding since we both will be so busy. My fiancé’s family is doing the rehearsal dinner but I was told they will invite my parents but want my parents to sit on the opposite side of the room than where they are. This puts such a stress on myself and my fiancé’s relationship and I feel as though this is so immature/petty that we are being punished for something my fiancé and I didn’t do. Just need some words of wisdom on how to move forward.

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Latest activity by CDickman, on July 7, 2019 at 7:18 PM

Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on July 7, 2019 at 6:22 PM
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I don’t understand..if you and your FH aren’t responsible for going over budget, who is? Why is this even an argument between your sets of parents? I would host my own rehearsal dinner before I would let my in laws start that kind of drama.
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VIP October 2020
Kelly · on July 7, 2019 at 6:47 PM
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Why would you have included them both in budgeting? That was a mistake.
All you can do now is have your husband talk to his mother and tell her she needs to behave like an adult and you're both not babysitting. You give the same talk to your own mother.
If needed sit them both down and tell them their behavior is unacceptable and you and your husband won't tolerate it and will not show up or host anymore events until they behave and give you both an apology for being such immature people and embarrassing you both during your wedding. And follow through on that. Simply stop doing anything with both of them until they act differently, you both need to put your foot down and set this boundry now
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Devoted July 2020
Stacey · on July 7, 2019 at 6:52 PM
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You are correct this is petty! Is your parents acting the same way?? If not then I think FH needs to talk to his parents and explain this is hurting his feelings because this is your all’s big day and with the pettiness that is happening it needs to stop that they are ruining what should be a magical time for you all. If your parents are also acting like this then I would say you need to do the same thing to them. If it’s about money tell each set of parents that you all will pay back whatever their issue is in monthly payments. Maybe if they think they are putting more burden on you both maybe they will realize the issue and stop acting this way. No matter what they need to be told.
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Master October 2020
Mandi · on July 7, 2019 at 7:17 PM
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Ignore it.
They're adults.
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VIP September 2019
CDickman · on July 7, 2019 at 7:18 PM
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I agteee neither set of pets needs to know what the other is paying. Nor should either sets of parents fight on the budget. If They should both feel comfortable contributing money they should contribute what they can. The to and your fiancé do the rest.
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Need opinions on family situation

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