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Master August 2016

Need Advice: Giving Away the Bride issues...

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Kiwi Kawaii, on December 14, 2015 at 7:32 PM

I hope this isn't too hot of a topic to bring up. But I would like some honest advice about what I should do. Originally in planning I was dead set on walking myself down the aisle, and possibly doing something like having FH meet me halfway. Outside of my dislike for the original tradition of being "given away" by one's father, I have some more personal issues with it. I love my dad. But our relationship is complicated, because there is still a part of me that isn't over the way he has acted towards our family at times over the years. Also though, he is still a soft person underneath all of that. And I am starting to realize that it might really hurt him if I say I want to walk alone, even if I explain that I don't like the tradition (would never say more than that of course). Anyway, is this one of those situations where I should be more considerate and do what would make him happy? Or should I stick to my original plan?

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Dedicated October 2015
Meg · on December 16, 2015 at 3:15 PM
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I see some people saying this already but in a Jewish wedding it's apparently traditional for the parents of the groom to walk him down and the parents of the bride to walk her down. H's parents walked him down and my grandmother walked me down since both my parents have passed. It was a nice family moment.

Honestly when I see a dad walking his daughter down the aisle these days I don't even see it as 'giving her away'. I just see it as family escorting you to the next stage of your life, to your new family. Maybe that's just my own outlook.
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Savvy April 2016
Con&Yo · on December 16, 2015 at 9:44 PM
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It made my dad not go to my sisters wedding, because she didn't want him to walk her down... and she wanted her brother (My Half-Sister) to walk her down, not our dad!! & let me tell you this she cried the night before and the day off the wedding because he chose not to show.. He didn't want to come because he thought that everyone would judge him for not walking her down.. In the end i told my sister you made a great choice, you need to make sure the person walking you down is the person who fully supports you!!! (If you chose to have anyone walk you down btw) To be very honest it makes things easier but can make them worse! Honest opinion my dad is a Selfish As***** for not coming though!
I'm having my brother walk me down since he is like my father figure & also because my dad told my mom he doesn't want to go to my GAY wedding.. so I decided not to even ask him to come... But i was originally going to walk alone since i wanted to do it different than tradition ! But it all depends on you... if you are close to your dad or if you think he will really get hurt, then i say let him walk you down... but if you honestly want to do it alone.. then do it.. some ppl may be hurt but in the end its your day!! Good luck hope this helped...
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Dedicated June 2016
Melanie · on December 18, 2015 at 1:36 AM
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This is almost EXACTLY like my situation at the moment, and I'm unsure what to do as well. The feminist inside me says "to hell with tradition!" but I am worried about hurting my dad's feelings by walking by myself even though our relationship has been complicated in the last few years. I have considered walking myself and still having a special dance at the reception, but then I run into the issue of having to explain all this to my family and hoping they understand. I'm just glad I'm not the only one with this issue!
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