My sister dropped out of my wedding

What were you asking her to do? She shouldn't have to help you plan. Sorry about your mom.

Sorry this is happening to you The MOH is only responsible for showing up on time, wearing the dress you selected, stand up with you at the ceremony, and attend the reception. Have you asked her to do additional tasks?

I agree with @Kathryn, something is funny with what you're asking her to commit to. It's your wedding and your bridal party, family or otherwise, is not obligated to help you plan anything or commit their time to you.

I think you have a reason to be upset, but without more information I can't say if you're in the right.

If you are hoping or expecting her to help with the planning I know it's disappointing that you were hoping to "plan it together" but at least she was upfront that her life is far too busy right now and it would be too stressful for her and eventually very stressful and frustrating for you if she can't be there in the way you want her to.

While it's not required of the MOH/BM's to hosts showers, often people look at it as job duty and this could be a reason why she feels she may not have the time. You should talk to her, being your MOH is as simple as slipping on the dress and standing by your side the day of.

I agree with mrs.a and was gonna write that. It can be very disappointing when no ones interested, but it's your wedding. One of the first things I learned on this site, is NO one will be excited about your wedding as you.

I'm sorry ladies for not making the post more detailed... I didn't ask her to do ANYTHING but come to dress fittings and to be at the wedding and reception .. That's it. I wasn't even expecting her to do no more then that.. I just wanted her to be there for me in my special day.

Ok then, your feelings are valid. Can you try to talk to her? It really sounds like she's expecting to have to do more, like plan and throw shower.

I understand your feelings. I would try to talk to her. Being a MOH is a very large financial commitment. I'm currently the MOH in two friends weddings and I've spent around $2k on one and will have spent well over $1k on the other. If it's really important she's in your wedding, you may have to sacrifice having her plan a shower or a bachelorette. It sounds like money and time could potentially be the underlying problem here which is totally understandable.

I think we say "all you have to do is wear a dress and show up," but how many of us who have been in weddings actually do JUST that? I'd guess very few. We want to help our friends and take part in making them feel special (planning showers/parties etc.) even if it is not the expectation of us. I say that to say, maybe that's how your sister feels. Whatever her financial/personal situation may be, she may feel that she can not be as present for you as she would like to be. While it may be upsetting to you, it may suck for her as well.

Thanks Emily and Karen, I've shared with my sister that I didn't need her to do anything but show up to the wedding.. My other sisters and cousin has already planned my shower and she knows this. I've stated this to her as well when she called me.. She just said, she's too busy and she's sorry she can't be my MOH but she said maybe she can be a greeter or read a scripture.. So I don't think talking to her again wouldn't matter. But don't want to walk around with unforgivingness.. I'm just hurt. Should I still invite her to the wedding?

Yes!!! It's your sister. My sister has been a total bitch to me, from not ordering her dress to telling me to uninvited someone. At the end of my day, she's still my sister.

I'm sorry she dropped out. Mine did too- it just plain stinks.

Concentrate on the good things happening! Do you have other BMs?

Yes.. I do Stitchingbride, I do, I have 2 other sisters and friends that's very supportive. I just wanted her to be apart because she's my sister.

So sorry.. I know how you feel. My oldest sister hasn't even ordered her dress or really actively talked about anything or showed any interest when my other sisters have. Had to beg her to go to the dress fitting for herself and my niece. I'm to the point where I don't care and don't ask about the dress.. It's on her..it's my day and it's gonna go on with or without her.. She will look like the stupid one. So sorry your sister dropped out. Hopefully she will change her mind..

Hazy- I'm in same boat as you.

Sorry to hear, hope it works out for you!

I'm sorry. Talk to your sister and tell her all you need is her support.

Is she still coming to the wedding?

@ Kathryn- yes!! It's just crazy!! I say how important it is and time sensitive.. But she turns the situation all about her.. And was more worried about Halloween costumes than her and her daughter's dress for my wedding..I haven't told my FH about me this though..@Chaunda I definitely understand how you want your sister to just be apart of it..that my dilemma.. I've stressed how my other sisters and family are excited and supportive and she shows no interest and she's the oldest.. I just hope your sister comes around.because your wedding is going to be a very beautiful day and she's going to regret it if she doesn't take part in it..