My parents are super controlling

Unfortunately, you’re going to have to set some boundaries with them that they aren’t going to like. At all. I suggest a counselor if you have not yet seen one, but your parents are over involved in your adult life.
I assume you still live with them, which would make this more difficult. Are you, personally, against living together before marriage? If not, I’d start packing my things. If for religious reasons this isn’t something you can do, I would get a place on your own. You clearly see things differently and at minimum, living independently will help you grow and mature on your own. From there, you can discuss moving in.
Next, I’d plan the wedding that you want and can afford and keep your expectations low with them. You DO NOT need their approval. You are an adult. Chat with FH and discuss next steps, then broach the topic with your parents or simply begin taking the first steps. Good luck.

They need to learn that throwing a tantrum won't get them their way. Cut them off, plan a lovely wedding with your fiancé (ring included), and live a happy life without them.

You know what you want and your wants come first since you're an adult. Like Jasmine said: cut them off if needed because you'll need to decide: either you do what you want and marry the man you love or you listen to them at the expense of your own happiness. While I can see why it would be hard to cut them off, I'm wondering why would you care about people, including parents, who don't care what you think/how you feel and are only treating you like a an underage?

I personally don't want to move in with him till after marriage. It's a personal preference of mine and he also agrees with me as well. I am actually leaving in less than a week for Texas for a show I got hired for. I do still live with them so being away for two months will be nice(my fiancé is planning on visiting as often as he can).

They have "controlled" me pretty much my whole life. They say that I can do what I want and they will support me but when it comes to doing something that they don't want it's a no from them. I am a very big people pleaser and just want everyone to be happy with me. But because of the way they have lashed out with me not just with this situation but other things in the past, I have really bad anxiety when it comes to talking about the subject. It gets to the point where I can stop shaking and in extreme cases vomit.

It would be easy to "cut them off" from my life but they are my parents. I know they love me it's just a really hard situation to be in and I literally just want to hide in a corner and never come out

You are an adult, you don't nee your parents' permission to marry. That said, is this really about them worrying about you career, or is there more to it? Because that's a pretty extreme reaction.
Honestly, you already proved that you will let yourself be manipulated by initially giving the ring back. It seems like you are afraid to make your own decisions and need someone to tell you what to do. The best thing for you would be to live alone for a few years, learn to stand on your own two feet and get to know who you are when you have no one to tell you what decisions to make. Because this situation seems like you are fleeing one controlling environment (your parents) only to exchange it for another one (your potential husband).

View Quoted Comment I was going to say the same things. I think everyone should live on their own and be totally independent before entering any marriage. As much as you love each other its very important to know who exactly you are, what you bring to the relationship and most importantly that you can take care of yourself. Being in Texas for 2 months away from them is a good start. If you're not adult enough to stand up to your parents, are you adult enough to be married? They're you're parents and it's difficult but you need to start asserting yourself and showing them that while you love them you will lead your own life.

You say that them controlling you has caused you to have anxiety and be unable to address certain topics with them. Have you thought about counseling? Setting boundaries with them is going to be important and I can tell you from personal experience that working with a great counselor can make a world of difference when doing that. You need to move out- if not with your FH, try by yourself or with roommates. So long as you are dependent on them for a place to live or financial assistance, they will continue trying to push you into their vision of your life.

View Quoted Comment The problem with people pleasing is, you usually end up neglecting yourself. You do not need to cut off all contact or relationship with your parents. But if you want your independence and happiness, it will take a few ruffles feathers to get there. Confrontation and anxiety provoking conversations suck, but tend to be the only thing to resolving an issue or reestablishing boundaries. They *will* try to guilt you and manipulate you, don’t let them. Stay firm in whatever you decide and ultimately they will come around.

View Quoted Comment I would definitely start with being more independent from your parents. Work towards moving out of their house and on your own. You don't necessarily need to cut your parents out of your life, but at least set boundaries. When they try to control you or tell you what you can/can't do, remind them that you're an adult and can make your own choices. If they start yelling at you and lashing out and throwing your belongings, leave (once you have your own place). If they behave that way at your house, ask them to leave. I agree with the previous comments that living on your own before marriage will help you. I also agree that you do not need their approval to get married. If your parents offer financial assistance with the wedding, I would decline it and pay for the wedding that you and your fiance can afford on your own. That way, they cannot use money to try to control your wedding.

I guess not really much to add other than it is time to live your life on your terms! Work towards your independence and becoming an independent adult so that when they have their tantrums, you're not around to see it.

It is one of the hardest transitions in life--I used to wander around thinking "What do you mean, I don't need permission to do that?" LOL I called home to discuss my plans well into my 20's and would tie myself in knots every time one of my parents told me not to do something I really wanted to do.

When I started living my life on my own terms and realized I didn't need their permission, it was pretty liberating. You will have to live with the consequences of your own actions, but it sounds as if you have a good head on your shoulders for what you want to do in life and a determination to do it. That's the best head start you can ask for!

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I actually have started counseling and it has helped a lot. My fiancé was very encouraging when deciding this. She has helped a lot and has helped me come up with plans on what to do about my current situation. I am leaving for Texas in about 4 days which I think the time away from them will help a lot. If they still do not agree to meet with me and my FH then I just plan on telling them "this is what I'm doing" and if they want to talk more about it, it will have to be done over facetime since I won't be at home. Which in a way I think might work because I won't be home for them to keep yelling at me