My fiancé doesn’t have family.

My husband has very few relatives he is in touch with in comparison to me. I had about 30 relatives while he had 6. Honestly he didn’t mind as much... his groomsmen are friends that have been like brothers to him. He’s way closer with those friends than I am with my bridesmaids or most of my friends. And besides after the wedding, there’s no “sides” anymore, they’re all both of your family!

Why is he feeling worried about the rehearsal dinner? My take on it is rehearsal dinners are usually intimate with the wedding party and the parents of the bride and groom.

What exactly is he worried about with it? Being without family is hard, but the rehearsal dinner is usually a pretty casual thing. It’s just to thank the bridal party and immediate families. You don’t have to have one. You also don’t have to have fancy one. As for the wedding, maybe there are some family elements you could eliminate. My guy’s best friend just married someone from another country. She had her parents and a couple of friends but no one else. They kept the ceremony brief and tried to just focus on the new family they were forming, not the separate ones. They skipped a lot of “traditional” things. I’d ask your fiancé what you guys can do to make the situation more comfortable for him. Maybe there are things you can alter or eliminate.

View Quoted Comment I was wondering the same thing!

I would start by letting him know that the ones he has there are are ones whose celebrating him (& you) and that’s all that matters. My motto embrace those who embrace you and concentrate on them six verses the family whom he doesn’t communicate with. I would also let him know that my family is his family and focus on the love there.

Of our 60 guests, 13 of them are "his" the majority of those guests are friends who I am now friends with as well. The only family of his that I know will be there for sure are his parents and his brother. He seems to be ok with it, so I can't offer any advice on how to handle the rehearsal dinner. Has he said exactly why it stresses him out?

Oh no! I also had an unbalanced guest list for our rehearsal.


Our San Diego wedding was semi-destination with most of my guests having to drive 2 hours and my husband’s guests mostly coming from the east coast and Midwest.
Our rehearsal/welcome dinner had about 80 people and only 15 of those were from my side since most of my family/friends were coming the day of the wedding or the night before (wedding was Saturday and rehearsal/welcome dinner was Thursday night). I was a little nervous and to be honest, embarrassed by it when we were first planning it, but honestly, when the time came... I didn’t even notice or care. Everyone was there to celebrate the BOTH of us. Also, my husband’s dad and his sister (who was one of my bridesmaids) gave beautiful speeches that not only included me, but also welcomed my family and friends into the fold and toasted to them as well. I thought was super sweet, and my parents were so touched by how welcoming everyone was towards them.
Is anyone giving speeches at your rehearsal dinner? I think definitely thanking/acknowledging your husband and dad would be nice if someone on your side is giving a toast/speech. Or maybe if his dad would like to give one?

I Have 8 Family Members Coming To Our Wedding Of 60 Guests because Thats All I Have. The Rest Is His Family So I Can Understand . Maybe Ask Him Why The Rehearsal Dinner Is Bothering Him So Much And Try To Help. Tell Him He Has The People There That Love And Support Him The Most & That Its Usually Pretty Casual. Goodluck.

I have little family. Just my sister and 3 nieces...who now is pregnant and due around November.....

So friends, friends, friends for me!

My dad comes from a very abusive family so he has had no contact with his family since he left his childhood home at 18. He had a few friends at the wedding, but was really outnumbered. Ultimately, he just accepted that the wedding meant he was being accepted into a new family. I was born well after the wedding, but my parents have shared the details. They didn't seat people according to side and kept the rehearsal dinner to a minimum. (Just the wedding party and immediate family, no extended family or out of town guests.) If you have a rehearsal it's traditional to thank your participants for their time by feeding them, but this doesn't have to by formal or involve anyone not directly in the wedding if it makes him sad or uncomfortable.

Usually only parents, sometimes siblings of the bride and groom, plus the wedding party are at rehearsal dinner. Although so.e invite others,. Most basic rehearsal dinners don't. Only 1 of my 8 sibs and his girlfriend, plus my parent and WP, we're at our pre-wedding dinner, with his parents, and 2 of his 12 sibs. Most RD I have been to as a member of the wedding party have only been parents , not sibs. Just don't invite extended family. And with his WP guys, and Dad, he will be close in numbers to your parents and your ladies and you. And groom's family is not required to do it, it is one option.

To help his stress I would only have bridal party and immediate family. make his friends and dad feel special you guys are becoming 1 family now! and although I can understand his stress your job is to help him feel better about it. Speak to your family about it. Maybe they can add some personal touches to their speeches to make him feel better and or have a talk with him prior that he is their family now and he is so much richer with people who loves and cares about him.