It has always been my dream to elope to vegas and tell no one until after the fact. My mom and sister have always made it a big deal that they would be so hurt if not included. Originally mom loved my at the time boyfriend so I considered doing the whole big wedding at home thing with all our family because I thought “wow, I finally found a person who that could be fun to do that with” long story short that fell through so vegas was on. My mom and sister knew about the impending wedding and so what the hell I will honor their feelings and they can come. We pay a large portion for them to come. After I have booked all my things and tell them they can wear any dressso long as it’s black or red, they go and buy dresses that are navy blue. I change everything to suit them. The weekend we are there they tell me they feel like I wish they hadn’t came which isn’t true at that point and now I’m upset because they are saying oh we would have supported you if you said don’t come. The night before both get drunk and I end up babysitting them. The day of getting ready both of them are not focused on me at all and acting all mopey. I paid for their hair and make up. I had told my mom I wanted to walk myself down the aisle she guilted me into letting her and now I really hate it. They spent the whole dinner afterwards complaining about how long it would take to get back to the hotel and left dinner early because of it. We where supposed to fly out the same time the next day, they got a separate ride half an hour earlier and let us know via text. My sister then texts me the next day saying she doesn’t want to be around me anymore this is after she signed as witness on my marriage certificate. My day was supposed to be fun and just for me and my husband instead I had to cater to them and it completely ruined the feeling of my day. It’s been a week and already I wish I could rewind and do it all over because it was nothing like I wanted and makes me want to cry.
Oh and now my mom makes comments about she over spent for the wedding (all purchases on her vacation clothing nothing to actually help pay for any of the wedding) and it makes me feel incredibly guilty too because there where times growing up when we where broke and I HATED that I did anything that cost money, my mom knows this.
I'm so sorry that your day wasn't what you expected when it came to your family members. The biggest lesson I learned during my own wedding planning was that no one was going to be as excited for my wedding, as my husband and me. I also found it difficult to accommodate everyone and their opinions throughout the planning, so I just stopped trying to accommodate and kept details to myself. If you wanted to elope, you should have. It's unfortunate that you gave in (to multiple demands it sounds like), allowed them to come, paid for it, and then had to deal with their behavior.
I do feel as though we're missing big pieces of information from your story though.
I'm not understanding how your sister can text you that she doesn't want to be around you anymore because of her and your mom's behavior?
That sucks! Sending big hugs your way because I’d be so hurt & angry. If you haven’t taken a honeymoon yet, can you do a vow renewal with just the TWO of you? Maybe those will be the wedding photos you can hang in your home. Or maybe save for a future Vegas trip where you can renew your vows there & have the dream elopement you wanted. You deserve a “do over!” If not now, in the future.
View Quoted Comment
I agree with this - I'm so sorry that your mom & sister hijacked your weekend! That was super unfair.
However, congratulations to you and your husband on getting married!