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Rosalie
Dedicated July 2023

My cousin is a monster.

Rosalie, on January 31, 2023 at 9:57 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 1 16

She just threatened to wear this to my wedding over text. I assume she already bought it or something like it. She did this to my sister. She wore an identical dress and a veil to my sister's wedding. I'm trying to be chill, but I'm honestly panicking over this. Don't think I'm a bridezilla, but I would want to kick her out if she showed up in this.

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16 Comments

Latest activity by Breana, on June 8, 2023 at 11:17 AM
  • V
    Rockstar July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    What is wrong with your family? First your mom and now your cousin. I'm so sorry they are acting like this. I personally wouldn't invite your cousin if she's going to be like this or I would hire security and if she shows up in a dress like this or similar have them escort her out.
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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    I 100% get why you would be upset, but as a guest, I would totally just assume that your cousin is insane and judge the heck out of her and then pay her no mind. She would be getting attention for all the wrong reasons, and you can’t argue with a narcissist.
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  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece Online ·
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    Totally agree with Veronica. To be honest, I wouldn’t invite your mother or your cousin after their behavior. Were you also the one that had the sister with all the dramatic friends that ruined your wedding shower?? If so, I would uninvite the lot of them! Wedding guests should be those closest to you. Those who care for you and support you. These individuals are showing you they do not. I hope this doesn’t come across too harshly, but if you still choose to invite these people to your wedding, you won’t have anyone to blame but yourself if it’s ruined. They have shown you their true colors. They have literally spelled out for you their intentions to upset you, disrespect you, and potentially ruin your wedding. If you still choose to invite them, you are doing so knowing the potentially disastrous outcomes, and making the conscious decision to take that on. That is, of course, your decision to make. If you do, however, I would caution not to have a meltdown or put any sorrow or negativity on your spouse on your wedding day/night. It would not be fair to ruin your fiancé’s experience because you knowingly chose to invite toxicity to your wedding.
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  • Jacks
    Rockstar November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    I wouldn't invite the people that are behaving like asshats. Actions have consequences. They are treating you with disrespect, and therefore are entitled to no respect back.

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  • Alyssa
    Super October 2023
    Alyssa ·
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    I feel like at this point you should hire security for your wedding and have your family escorted out.
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  • Keri
    Keri ·
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    You're not a bridezilla. Kick her out.
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  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
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    I'm wondering if some of these relatives are doing this intentionally to try to get a reaction out of you. Personally, I wouldn't even invite them. If they're making "threats" of attention-seeking clothes that they'll wear to your wedding (that they seem to know are not OK to wear to a wedding as a guest), they are intentionally making things more stressful for you. Why associate with people who act like this? These don't seem like people who support you. If it were me, I wouldn't want anything to do with them, and absolutely would not be inviting them to my wedding, or even communicating with them going forward. I would also recommend hiring security to ensure that these people do not try to crash your wedding. Sorry that all this has happened! You can't control the actions of others, but you can control how you respond to it.
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  • M
    VIP August 2021
    Michelle ·
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    Protect your Future Spouse from this normalized dysfunction. Disinvite and hire security. Give Security pictures of your family to prevent crashers.

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  • L
    Lady ·
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    Just don't invite her or roll your eyes and move on. SHe'll look like an idiot if she shows up in that.

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  • Julija
    Expert October 2023
    Julija ·
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    Holy smokes! Who in their right mind would do this? Especially family?!?!? That is so messed up. I would hire security to specifically handle this. Uninvite her for sure.

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  • Rosalie
    Dedicated July 2023
    Rosalie ·
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    I have thought about it for sure. My mom is supportive, contrary to popular opinion. She just chose a flagrantly inappropriate thing to wear and she eventually gave up on the whole sister's hair thing. Overall she's been a good MOB.

    And I definitely would uninvite the cousin, but then her mom would get mad, and then it'd most likely cause some family rift. And I would definitely want to call security. But I've found with my attention hogging family members, ignoring them works better than causing a scene.

    They want attention, if I do not give it to them, they do not get what they want. If I don't let it bother me, then my wedding will stay intact. And I definitely disinvited the two girls who got in the brawl at the bridal shower. No way I am going to have a brawl at my wedding.

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  • Julija
    Expert October 2023
    Julija ·
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    That's fair. I don't know. You're a better person than I am.

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  • R
    Rockstar
    Rosebud Online ·
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    Oh man this is beyond ridiculous and frustrating. I m sorry you are having to deal with such behaviors. The important thing to remember here is we cannot control other peoples actions/behavior but we can control our reactions to it. As many others have said don't give her the satisfaction of a huge reaction. I would however very clearly say to both her and her mother you expect all of your guests to respect you and your partner and nobody should be showing up in bridal attire and any childish behavior/threats will not be welcome at the wedding. Whatever she does please do not let her steal your joy. I would also instruct the photographer if anyone is dressed inappropriately please do not take photos of that person. If she does show up in that dress your guests will be giving her the side eye all evening, the person that will reflect poorly on is her. If you can ignore her until the wedding I would and focus on putting your energy into the people that are supporting you and loving you. Best of luck to you!

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  • Jazmin
    Beginner September 2024
    Jazmin ·
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    Wow speechless who in their right mind?? Kick her out or don’t invite!!!
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  • S
    Just Said Yes June 2023
    SH ·
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    Honestly the wedding has turned into a circus. Remember the wedding is about you and your fiancé.
    I had a good college friend who I was supposed to be in the wedding. She called complaining how the wedding had gotten out of control and the guest list was at 500 and still counting! Yes you read that correctly. I told her I always imagined her getting married barefoot on the beach (she is a marine biologist) and she needed to speak up since the wedding was way off what she and her fiancé wanted. She changed from the massive church/country club wedding to Bahamas and invited immediate family and everyone originally asked to be in the wedding. Was a wonderful time and she had those closet to her at the wedding. She was grateful I suggested she take a step back. It sounds like you need to do the same and take control of your wedding.

    FWIW, at a minimum disinvite your cousin and if your aunt gets upset, disinvite her. I would also have a private heart to heart with your Mother regarding her inappropriate wedding attire. It is easy for MOB to get wrapped up in the moment. She looks beautiful in the dress but is not close to being appropriate MOB attire. She could wear a beautiful fitted dress and not be mistaken for a quinceanara dress. If your Mom still will not change her attire you may need to make the tough decision of not having her there. Your Mom should not upstage you on your wedding. That dress is over the top. I truly wish you the best. Hang in there.


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  • Breana
    Just Said Yes February 2024
    Breana ·
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    Don’t invite your cousin
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