Mrs. or Ms?

Following! FH and I were just talking about this. FH's BM's wife kept her maiden name and we weren't sure how to address the invitation.

If a couple is married and wife kept maiden, I would do: Mr Jones and Ms. Smith. Mrs. Smith would imply that she married a Mr Smith when she married Mr Jones!

A married woman is Mrs. if she changes her last name or keeps her maiden name.

If you're uncomfortable or unsure Ms. is fine for any situation.

Ms. is a catch-all that really can be used for any adult woman, married or not, name changed or not. I would only use Mrs. if I knew she took her husband's last name.

Calling a married woman who keeps her last name “Mrs.” is incorrect. The correct way to address her is Ms. Mrs. means “wife of” so “Mrs. Maidenname” would be inappropriate.

The actual definition of Mrs. is “a title used before a surname or full name to address a married women”. A friend of mine who is becoming a teacher kept her last name (Stewart) and she goes by Mrs Stewart. Whether I keep my last name or take my FW last name I would still go by Mrs. There isn’t really a right or wrong way

Or if you’re unsure what she goes by just ask, I’m sure she wouldn’t be offended and has been asked multiple times.

I would say when it doubt, Ms. is the safe title to use. Just went through this in addressing my own invitations this week!

I address any married woman as Mrs. I wouldn’t want to make them feel like I didn’t recognize their marriage just because they didn’t take their husband’s name

I feel like Ms. is the safe option here. My mom kept her maiden and goes by Ms. However, it's not like she gets offended when referred to by Mrs. maiden or my dad's last name.

If you don't want to ask them personally, I would use "Ms." Some women who didn't change their name might also not like that their title changes because they're married, unlike "Mr.," which stays the same.

Ms. for a married woman who kept her maiden name.

I’d say Ms. Mrs. wouldn’t really be right. Some women who are married with their FH last name prefer Ms. too...the whole idea behind Ms. was to give women the equivalent of Mr....so they don’t have to announce their marital status.

Even If she kept her maiden name she can be addressed as Mrs. I would address it to the couple Mr and Mrs Smith or The Smith Family.... maybe the smith-jones family...

View Quoted Comment You would address the invitation to Mrs. Smith even though that’s not her name?

View Quoted Comment Mrs means "wife of" so in sending invites to the couple i would say mr and mrs. If this person was divorced or widowed otter for some reason the spouse was not invited I would address it to Ms...

View Quoted Comment Um yeah, don’t do that. It’s super disrespectful to blatantly call someone by the incorrect name.

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Yeah, don't do that. If I kept my name, I would want (and expect) the following:

Mr Adam Jones and Ms. Jennifer Adams

But if someone sent something to us as Mr/Mrs Adam Jones I would be chill.

Same sex: Mr Michael Westman and Mr Jeffrey Landon (I had same sex couples to our wedding)

Don't over think this!

View Quoted Comment That’s 100% not correct and rude. You’re blatantly calling someone by the wrong name. If someone does it mistakenly it’s not a big deal. If it’s done intentionally it’s rude.

I’m keeping my maiden name and have done a lot of looking into this. My impression is the “proper” way is Ms. Jones. Mrs. Jones implies she is married to Mr. Jones. So if he’s Jones and she’s smith and is called Mrs. Smith it would imply her spouse is Mr. Smith.

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Seriously. If someone put Mrs. FHslastname because they didn't know I'm not changing my name, I'd be slightly annoyed. If someone put Mrs. FHslastname despite KNOWING that I'm not changing my last name, I would be incredibly disrespected. You just 100% disrespected my decision.