Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith - yay or nay for invitations?

I think both are fine... just one is a little more work if youre hand writing them!

I think either is fine. We got rid of the mr. and mrs. portion and just said X and Y Duke - that way we’re not stressing too much about addressing someone correctly or making sure you’ve got the right order not to offend someone

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I was considering dropping the Mr. and Mrs. as well! Hmm will still consider that.

We did Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Smith because I felt like that looked a little better to me, but Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith is good too!

I wouldn’t be like, upset or offended by Mr. and Mrs. John Smith, but I’m not a huge fan of it. Seems a bit antiquated and outdated. Especially when the wife is the one you’re friends with, and you’re just inviting her and her husband... but her first name doesn’t even appear on the invitation? Kinda just looks like she’s an extension of her husband to me...

Sorry I’m going all feminist hahaha, in all seriousness if I received an invitation to Mr and Mrs John Smith I would understand it’s the traditional way of addressing things, but I still feel like there are better, more modern ways of doing so (like mentioned above)

It is grammatically incorrect. Fine to use both first and last names of both members of a couple. But it should be either Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Smith. OR Mr. John and Ms. Jane Smith OR Ms. ( or Mrs.) Jane Smith and Mr. John Smith. If long names, and they are married, you put one long name on the top line, AND or &, 2nd line for other name. Mrs. Concordia Santolucito and Mr. Giancarlo Santolucito. If the two are not a married couple, then they go on two separate lines. One for each name, with no AND or &. And at the end of the first, they are married.

I will be just writing
John and Jane Doe.

Mr and Mrs John Doe seems very old school to me lol

I would do Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Smith. The title should stay with the first name.

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Right! That's exactly how I feel - the traditional way just seems so outdated and especially when the woman is person in the couple you are closer to!

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That does make more sense - keeping the title with the name!!

I did mine as you have in your title. Yeah, the title didn’t stay with the name, but people only look at the address label for a second before throwing out the envelope. As long as I properly acknowledged any Doctors, I don’t think people really care how you say their names on the label. Even if it is technically grammatically incorrect.

View Quoted Comment Yeah I feel like using both people’s first names is the best way to go

I did as others, and used John and Jane Doe. This helped also for couples wherein the wife kept or hyphenated her name. John Doe and Jane Smith, or Jane Smith-Doe.

We are addressing traditionally. I can't be bothered with people's "feelings" about something so trivial. If you as the addressee, don't like the traditional, I think it should rather say Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Smith so the names stay clustered together.

I hate "Mr. and Mrs. Firstname Lastname." I think it is awful and demeaning. H and I share different identities and that didn't stop when we got married. We addressed all of our invitations to married people as "Mr. Firstname LastName and Mrs. Firstname Lastname."

I know this is an old post, but I wanted to say thank you for bringing this up. As much as I want to not sweat the small stuff, this really doesn't sit right with me either! My Mom is insisting, as we are currently doing our Save The Dates & Invites. It's harkens back to the days when woman were far less visible. It wasn't really that long ago where a woman couldn't get a bank loan or own her own business without a man backing her on paper. So as far as our invitations, we've compromised & I will address my mother and a few older people/she insists upon as such: Mr. and Mrs. John Doe. I'm sure many think I'm getting to ruffled up over this but this is just how I see it.

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The only way change happens in society, is to make recognizing women the norm and not the exception. Good job standing up for human rights!