Mother in Law

I would stop including her or telling her anything about the wedding.

I agree with Kelly, you need to set some boundaries. Is your FH any help with this? Perhaps he can have a conversation with her, but no matter what remember it's YOUR day and do not let her take your joy away from you. Best of luck!

If you've tried to tell her how you feel and she still hasn't changed, it's time for your FH to step in.

Listen, as annoying as it maybe you need to be political here. Have an honest conversation with your FH about how his mom is crossing the line but make sure you don't put her down just let him know what she's saying is upsetting you. If you go out of your way to be nice and she does not your FH will notice. When you marry a man you marry his family that's a fact so unless you want a lifetime of hardship you have to just let certain things go. I do agree with you FMIL that you should have had her and your FH sisters attend the dress shopping. Think of it from her shoes her little boy is getting married and she wants to be part of it. I honestly think it's quite selfish you bought a dress without including them and you probably really hurt her feelings.

I would keep her in the dark and not include her in the planning.

She and the daughters can go help her son pick out his suit. She has no business expecting to be a part of the bride's dress shopping.

Well good for you, hon, but the OP is being bullied because FMIL wasn't invited to the dress shopping. If she's wanting to be involved with things like that, her son is also getting married, she can take part in his attire expeditions. The argument that it's her son, she wants to be involved, too, doesn't mean she gets to horn in on the bride's plans uninvited. Her desires in this don't overrule those of the bride. For all she (and we) know, the OP and her mom have always dreamed of doing this by themselves.

As a future mother-in-law who had a great relationship with her own mother-in-law and wants a great relationship with her future daughter-in-law, I'd ask you future brides who want to completely shut out your future mother-in-law to try and be a little more understanding and respectful.

The example given above (mother-in-law demanding that she and her sisters be invited dress shopping) is on the extreme side, but a mother-in-law wanting to 'help' with a small part of the wedding planning can be an incredible gift and make your day go smoothly.

At my wedding, my future husband's family did a lot of the planning and my wedding was like a fairy tale......All I had to do was find a dress and show up! :-)

I seriously doubt a “spontaneous road trip” brought you to a wedding dress store with you mom and sister. I can see brides leave out their overbearing FMILs, but buying the wedding dress is a huge event and meant the world to me when my future DIL invited me. She didn’t find her dress at the first store and her mother informed me they already set up a second store appointment which had a guest limit and I couldn’t go. Instead they brought two bridesmaid who the bride said she wished weren’t in her wedding. Apparently since asking them, she never hardly sees them. I was so hurt to think I couldn’t go again. If my MIL was good to me, I would choose another store or bump a bridesmaid. I was always supportive of my FDIL. Your MILs will be in your lives a long time. Bridesmaids often are not. If your MIL is telling you something means a lot, follow through! I was so insulted to be in the mix with her bridesmaids. And she mentioned I could go to a dress fitting instead, as her bridesmaid are doing. No thanks. It’s the moment you find the dress that’s exciting. Life is miserable if you can’t get along with your MIL. Little things go a long way. I really thought this experience would bring us closer and instead it did the opposite. She told her mother, who has already become nasty towards us. The last thing I’d do if my son had a problem with his FMIL would be to get involved. 😞