Most Important Reception Details as a Guest

Food, drinks and a great DJ. I've even been to dry weddings and the DJ is what made the wedding a hit. I have never been to a wedding with a photo booth, but we plan on having one at ours. FH and and I were at an event for my graduation and they had one and the line was so long (we actually hired the lady for ours), so we hope it's a hit at ours. I could not tell you what the center pieces looked like, if candles were used, what color linens were used at any of the weddings I've attended lol. I will say the last wedding FH and I attended, he made a comment about the personalized napkins because we were literally trashing them. The couple had their names, date and "best day ever" written on them, so we remember that because we thought it was a waste of money. We've also been to a wedding, where the food was sitting in the chafer dishes too long (the couple ran over the cocktail hour time taking pictures) and the food started burning. Long speeches and long dances, unless it is choreographed are boring. We are giving every one about a minute each for their speeches and spreading it during the reception.

As a guest at many weddings, I do look at décor, good food, good music, not too many speeches and the connection between bride and groom. I love to see how they actually enjoy their wedding and how at times its like no one else is in the room but them, that's what really makes it special to me.

I have not been to many weddings but other then my own, I went to 1 other this year and I would have to say seating. Not the food, booze or DJ since the food was pizza, the booze were serve yourself and the dj was a playlist on a speaker. All good but when you are literally standing for hours on end because no seats are available, in Florida, outside, in June.....yes it was miserable. Ceremony was standing only as well.

As a guest I think the food and the DJ are what stand out the most. I think 2-3 speeches that are under 2-3 minutes a piece is a perfect amount. Anything over people will start to get board. The weddings I’ve been to lately, the MOH and BM have winged the speeches and have gone on FOREVER.

As a guest, I think the music is the most important part. The dancing and just overall atmosphere of the venue is something I find myself talking about days after the event!

Good food/drinks and music/dancing are my tops.


I notice when there's not a good flow to the order of events at the reception. Get all of the formalities (speeches/planned dances) done with first so that everyone can enjoy the food and dancing.

Not just good food, but plentiful food (and drinks). We've been to several weddings where they ran out of food (or certain types of food) or run out of alcohol entirely (of course these weddings did not have bartenders, so people were helping themselves). Make sure the food is tasty and there's enough.

If you're having a cash bar, then make sure you tell people about it beforehand, so they bring money.

I notice the decor, but I don't get fussed about it one way or the other - unless someone takes my table to open up the dance floor lol.

We don't use the photobooth when there is one, but I know a lot of people do.

As far as games go, we've been to a couple weddings with games. I wouldn't (and didn't) do it - but you know your crowd.

Definitely keep the speeches to a minimum.

TBH my cousin, her husband, my finance, and myself were just discussing this question. We were talking about the main points, and what they thought would work great but ended up flaring out. Their DJ was awesome, the food was fantastic, but did not have a photobooth and tbh we did not really notice it not being there, would it have been a little bit more of keepsake absolutely, but we survived without it. The other thing my fiancé and I did not remember were the table center pieces (my cousin spent $1,000+ on flowers for center pieces) and I had to give the good ole, oh they were beautiful to save grace. Make it something easy (possible lantern from michaels with a simple battery powered candle)

Such a great question!

As a guest, it's helpful to have clear signage about where to go and be at what time. I've been to weddings where you had to shuffle between locations for different events and they weren't always easy to find, or there were "off limits" areas that weren't obvious.

I don't care much for prolonged "events" in which the guests are just spectators. I personally don't want to just sit at my chair for an hour while I watch four or five different dances and listen to as many speeches.

Similarly I think traditions that guests can opt to participate in are a bit more fun that ones that don't involve the guests at all, or that force guests to participate even if they don't really want to. Social pressure can be huge at weddings.

The whole garter thing is really weird to me. It feels super awkward to watch.

Bouquet tosses are also an odd tradition. Not as awful, but still singling people out feels odd in a way that I don't find fun or entertaining.

I personally have a difficult time with father-daughter dances, but it's because my dad died when I was in college. They usually make me cry (sad cry, not joyful cry) at weddings and I try to avoid them or step out when I can. I am always relieved when I don't need to sit through 4-5 minutes of a bride dancing with her dad. At our wedding we are going to try to do a join "parent child" dance where my FH and I both dance with our parents. That way it's less time for the guests to watch, and not as isolating or singling out of one relationship. I think this can be a good option for couples with parents who have remarried as well.

Great decor is nice, but it's really how the whole aesthetic comes together. I'm not paying particular attention to the details, more just that the overall environment looks thoughtful and cohesive.

I don't care about wedding favors. Most of them get left behind anyway. Personally I wouldn't mind going to a wedding that didn't have any.

I love photos and photo opportunities. I think weddings with polaroids are fun. I love old fashioned enclosed photo booths where you cram into this small space and the camera goes off three times and you get what you get, but think having a "photo booth" photographer with props is gaudy. I think it's great when there is a "photo background wall" established (basically just a photogenic backdrop) and guests can take their own photos.

I also really love looking at photos of the couple so love when couples have a display showing fun photos of them from vacations and other weddings, with their families, as kids, etc.

I'm a fan of easy to find seating arrangements and having place setting card or table list right when guests enter the reception venue.

Good food is a must.

Good music (that people can actually dance to) is a must.

Open bar. I don't even drink much and I hate cash bars. At the very least, have an open bar for cocktail hour, or do open beer and wine but cash liquor. If you are going to have a cash bar for your entire wedding, I think you need to let guests know in advance.

Also good drink selections. Have some nicer beers and wines, and decent quality alcohol. I'd rather pay for a decent drink then get free Coors Light all night long.

Have clean bathrooms and enough bathrooms for the number guests you have. I've heard horror stories of weddings with 100+ guests and just two porta potties.

Good food, and enough space to move around and/or dance! I went to a wedding once where there were just too many people for the size of the room, and it was impossible to dance because you kept crashing into people

In my opinion, the worst are long speeches and videos everyone has to sit and watch while doing nothing else... Keeping it fun and casual is my priority for our reception. 😊

Hands down good food and enough food for everyone. I’ve been at a wedding where the buffet ran out of food before all the tables had a chance to get a plate. I’ve also been at a wedding where the food got everyone sick and the bathroom was stuffed with people pretty much from the moment dinner ended to the moment we left (left early because we were queasy). I’ve also been to weddings where the couple chose to serve unusual buffet food and I basically just ate a ton of rolls. When it came to my wedding, we shelled out big bucks to do plated service and ensure the food was delicious and something people would recognize and like.


I also wouldn’t underestimate a good DJ. We didn’t need to spend on a photobooth because people were enjoying the table games before dinner and dancing nonstop afterwords. I’ve been to a wedding with no DJ and a poorly put together playlist and it was a disaster. No one heard the announcements or knew when things were happening, and no one danced because the music wasn’t dancing music. It was like a bad college party.

As a guest what I would be looking forward to is good food and a great music. I've been to a wedding that didn't have enough food because they invited so many people. We literally got a small spoon full of food. Not even an appropriate portion of each side. People at my table were complaining and still hungry.

View Quoted Comment 100% this. Food drinks and music. I've been to four weddings recently and only remember the decorations from one of them

Honestly, as a guest I go knowing and expecting the bride and groom to have planned for their day. I don't mind if there is a photo booth or open bar, I go in celebration of the wedding itself! If you plan your wedding for what your guests will think or in hope that it's the best wedding they'll go to then you're planning for others and not yourself!

As a guest, I like good food and plenty of time to dance!!! 😀 I’ve never noticed decor, linens or any of that stuff until I started planning a wedding myself. I say skip the speeches and the bridal games, serve a good meal and get on the dance floor!

Thank you, everyone, for your suggestions, advice, and input! Happy New Year!

I think the main things for me are 1) not having to wait an absurd amount of time after the ceremony for the reception to finally start, 2) not having to wait a long time for food, and 3) generally being comfortable. I went to a wedding where we were stuck in a holding room for over an hour for the "cocktail hour" while they set up the reception room, except there were no food or drinks and no places to sit down. I went to another wedding where the couple didn't enter the reception until 2 hours after the ceremony had ended, and dinner didn't start until 8 p.m. (it was a 5 p.m. ceremony). And at another wedding, the ceremony was outdoors in full sun on a 90-degree day and they didn't even provide water for guests. As long as you consider your guests' comfort, they will have a great time. Think about what would make YOU miserable at a wedding... and then do the opposite. Investing in good food (and having plenty of it) is one of the best things you can do. Keep things moving fairly quickly (don't drag out the time between the speeches, the cake cutting, the first dances, etc.). I may be biased because we had a photobooth at our wedding, but our guests loved it and it's a great way to keep people entertained during the cocktail hour!

The ONLY reason I pay attention to decor and details is because I am planning my own. If I weren't engaged, I wouldn't be looking for those things.
People will always remember how you made them feel. Food, music, and pacing of the event are key. People will remember if they had a good time. 😊

Good music and plenty of open floor time have been what I have loved. I'm also one of those sentimental people that used to keep favors until they were trashed by my stepfather (long drama story). My parents complain about food if it is not up to par but i'm not picky. Also being comfortable. I knew I had to have an inside place for my reception at minimum for climate control.