Mom is driving me crazy

Maybe stop thinking about it for a couple of days. Sometimes a break from wedding planning helps me. Learn what you're willing to budge on and what you're not. Also depends on where the cash is coming from.

Colors, flowers, venue...she thinks she knows best. She is more of a pale color scheme, im a dark colors. She likes lace I dont. She likes a venue my sister in law had hers at. I dont.

Even though she's paying for half, I feel I have no control. Sorry for venting

Have you told her how she's making you feel? She may not even notice! I would explain to her that it's your day, not hers. She had her time. Explain that times are different, maybe show her Pinterest! Lol

I've done all those things. My grandma planned her wedding so she didn't get too. I started crying today in the car with her after a bridal fair so she knows how I feel.

You need to have a conversation with her, calmly and lovingly, about how you can both compromise and have a good time here. Or it's going to be a long year and a half.

Or you can pay for the whole thing yourself and call the shots. Which, very often, is why people decide to pay for their own weddings

I know exactly how you feel !

I'm in the same boat. Everyone has something to say. I even had my friend label her self as the MOH when I am going to give it to my sister. My friend also is ticked at me for not wanting things her way. She wanted to make origami flowers and for me to have her favorite flowers as my bouquet. My mom and grandma are pushing me to wear my moms old dress. My FMIL is inviting people that we do not talk to our want at our wedding. It's all a mess and I'm pretty far away from mine too. Good luck!

My mom is the same way. I have hurt her feelings multiple times just by having different tastes. She is so stuck on this idea of having balloons hang from the ceiling at the reception, i think it looks like a retirement party.

What I have done is told her fewer details of the wedding until i have made a decision. so instead of texting her every possible catering menu, I will only tell her once FH and I have picked a caterer.

I'm also paying more attention to how I receive her ideas...my new favorite phrase is "Thats a great idea. I will think about how it could fit into the vibe I'm going for" instead of "no mom, i hate that" "this is my wedding" or just plain "no"

since ive started doing those two things, weve been getting along much better. Just make sure your mom knows that you love her and value her opinion, but your wedding should reflect you and your FH

Have you tried, "Mom, do you remember how you felt when Grandma took over your wedding? I feel like you're doing that to me, now. I wish you could just express an opinion once and then let it go. I love you, and I want you to be part of this, and that's hard for me when I feel like, to you, your opinion about my wedding matters more than mine.: Another way to go is to just cancel all her suggestions with, "No, FH and I have decided...." most parents will cross their own kids but NOT the couple as a unit.

Thanks for this thread it was very helpful. My mom is making me feel the same way and it's driving me crazy. She acts like I stabbed her in the back any tome I tell I don't like something that she likes. She says that I need let go of the control, but it's MY WEDDING! I wish she would remember that shes there to help bring my vision to life not try to bring her vision to life.