Mom and Step Mom Not Getting Along- HELP

I'll be in the same boat as you. My mom is hell to deal with and my step mom is amazing. I hate saying that, but it's the truth. I want both their with me getting ready so I plan on telling them to suck it up. My mom would be the drama causer, she's horrible, and I plan on having a talk with her. If she gets pissy, she doesn't need to be with me getting ready. I hope you figure it out!

Both my parents are remarried. I basically told them they could behave, or stay away from each other, but my step parents have been in my life for 17 years. I'm not changing that on my wedding day because someone wants to be petty.

@hammett exactly how I feel

Exactly. It's just ridiculous at this point. It's one day and they need to either get along or don't come and miss out on their daughter's wedding day. Sheeesh

Your mom needs to grow up and not make it about her and her feelings.

I mean, is it going to make the situation worse if you tell your mom to grow up? And that she isn't setting a very good example of conflict resolution?

I'm sorry you're having issues with this! My parents are both remarried as well. Unfortunately, I don't really have much advice as my mom is refusing to attend anyway but I'd suggest telling your mom it is what it is and she just needs to be civil for just one day. It's really not much of a request in my opinion.

I put them at different tables, and booze.

ETA: This was for the reception, stepmom didn't get ready with us.

It is your day and you should be able to have whoever you want there with you!

Stupid. I am the same way but with my fiances mom and step mom. I told them either be civilized or not come.

Similar situation here. I got ready with my stepmom and my mom got there later in the day. My mom was never around for me and is hard to deal with. I didn't want the stress while I was getting ready. I also sat them far apart at the reception.

Katie, this is only the beginning-- there will be your children's births, their birthdays, graduations... better to get this settled now.

"Mom, it's been a long time since you and dad divorced. You know 'stepmom' can never take your place and is still an important person in my life, so I will be including her in X event. I hope you will be there, too."

All married couples need to sit down and decide on their boundaries with family members. Both women need to act like adults. All that is needed is a tablespoon full of manners and maturity. This needs to be clearly communicated to all. Mommy and Step Mommy... this is how it's going to be. Please respect our decisions. Put your foot down. somebody needs to think of the welfare of the 12 year old.

View Quoted Comment How did this talk go for you? I am 90 days from my day and my mom is ready to start the drama and isn’t afraid to make it known to me and I don’t know what to do anymore. Every time she says something or my sister it just adds so much stress that isn’t needed.