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Dedicated November 2019

moh with Pregnancy Complications

Bethany, on November 4, 2019 at 11:19 AM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 13
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My best friend and co-maid of honor was originally due to have her baby in January. Last week she was diagnosed with pre-eclampsia and spent a couple nights in the hospital. She may end up having to deliver very early in the next couple weeks. I am so worried about her and her baby. Before she had any health complications, I offered to throw her a baby shower in early December, and organize a meal train for her.

What do I do if she ends up in the hospital during my wedding or honeymoon? I hate the thought of not being there for her. I am still organizing her meal train, and she's asked that the baby shower is still set for the same date.

I really want to offer her and her husband as much support as possible (I am close with both of them). I've told them that I can help with any household stuff or caring for their animals, whatever they may need. But I won't be able to do it on my wedding day Nov. 16 or while I'm in Jamaica for the week after. They have family and lots of other friends in town to take care of them as well.

Is there anything that I haven't mentioned that you think I should do for her to help or make her feel supported?

13 Comments

Latest activity by Renee, on November 5, 2019 at 1:30 AM
  • Lacy
    Dedicated October 2020
    Lacy ·
    • Flag

    I think you are doing exactly what you should be doing. Kudos to you for making the focus about her and the baby and not about you and your wedding. You are a great friend, and she is lucky to have you!

    • Reply
  • Neeva
    VIP September 2020
    Neeva ·
    • Flag

    I think what you've laid out is awesome!

    You don't need to do anymore, just supporting and offering to do a shower and help with meals is great.

    If your wedding happens to be at the same time, she will understand.

    • Reply
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag

    It sounds like you're making every reasonable effort, I wouldn't worry that you're not doing enough!

    • Reply
  • Ivy ORP
    VIP October 2019
    Ivy ORP ·
    • Flag

    It sounds like you are a very good friend and are doing what you can to help. I'm sure it means a lot to both of them.

    • Reply
  • M
    Expert September 2020
    Marcia ·
    • Flag
    You sound like a great friend. Sometimes just being an ear to listen is helpful in this situation. The meal train is an awesome and very helpful idea. She’s lucky to have you in her life.
    • Reply
  • Jade
    Devoted August 2021
    Jade ·
    • Flag
    I agree with people above! You’re doing all that you can. Just keep her in your prayers & continue to do what you’re doing! Best of wishes to you and your friend 💗
    • Reply
  • B
    Dedicated November 2019
    Bethany ·
    • Flag

    Thank you everyone! I really appreciate the support and well wishes.

    Has anyone on here had a 2 month or more premature baby themselves and everyone turned out healthy and ok? Looking for hopeful stories. Thanks!

    • Reply
  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
    • Flag

    I would have someone Facetime or stream the wedding so she can see it (if she is available) in the hospital & be in charge of sending her snapchats, pictures, etc. so she feels included. Maybe call her the morning of the wedding too.

    I think the meal train is a great thing to organize. I'm sure they won't be mad or disappointed you can't be of more assistance during your wedding or honeymoon (I doubt they would expect you to). My sister in law & friends have had babies, and what they've asked for/loved is: pre-made or delivery food (so gift cards to pizza places or apps like DoorDash or Postmates, etc.), in-home massages gift cards (Zeel,etc.), or paying for a cleaning lady to come to their house (usually one that does laundry, changes the sheets, etc. in addition to cleaning the house). I've also come and done cleaning myself, but if I was out of town or not nearby I paid for a cleaning service 1 time to help.

    But I really think you are doing more than enough & wouldn't worry! I just gave those suggestions in case you want to do more.

    • Reply
  • Jennifer
    VIP August 2021
    Jennifer ·
    • Flag

    You seem like a great friend! Keep up what you are doing now!

    • Reply
  • Jodie
    Expert August 2020
    Jodie ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    I've had a few friends that had very premature babies. They had to hang out in the NICU for a bit, but they are all happy and healthy today. They range in age from a year old up to 24 years old. So don't panic yet. Just keep being supportive and helpful. I'm sure your friend will appreciate whatever help you are able to give. Good luck!

    • Reply
  • Jeanie
    Super February 2020
    Jeanie ·
    • Flag
    Try not to feel guilty over having your wedding and honeymoon while she’s going through this. You have done so much to try and help her already. I’m sure she’s appreciating everything, and also feeling some sort of way about all this go on when you’re about to get married. Life continues on whether we’re having good moments or bad. The best we can do is support each other when needed and rejoice together when good things happen. I hope everything goes well for your friend and her baby. And congrats!
    • Reply
  • Kiley
    Expert November 2019
    Kiley ·
    • Flag

    I think just providing reassurance that it's ok and you understand if she can't make it to the wedding. I wouldn't "replace" her. Still leave her on the program, etc and have her as an honorary MOH. I am sure she is already worried about interrupting your big day. Otherwise, don't bite off more than you can handle. Like you said, she has others to help as well.

    • Reply
  • Renee
    Super October 2020
    Renee ·
    • Flag

    If she has preeclampsia, she'll definitely be having the baby early. I had it with my first child and if it turns into eclampsia, it can be fatal. You're an awesome friend for helping so much. I hope everything works out for everyone

    • Reply

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