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Mrs.Matthews
Master January 2015

Military wedding, do I have to wear my uniform if asked to, as a guest?

Mrs.Matthews, on February 23, 2015 at 10:54 AM Posted in Wedding Attire 0 19

One of my friends is getting married, and is inviting a bunch of us from our unit as we are very close. He wants us all to wear our dress uniforms. Here is the thing, there are only 2 females in the unit me and my friend. For a guy they seem to like wearing their dress uniforms, but as a girl, they make you feel so ugly. I really don't want to attend a wedding with my hair slicked back, no makeup, and in pants. Should I just suck it up, what would you do?

19 Comments

Latest activity by Brigit, on February 24, 2015 at 8:26 AM
  • L + A
    VIP May 2015
    L + A ·
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    I would say ask them why they want your entire unit in uniform, and go from there. If it isn't an idea that'll make you change your mind about being comfortable wearing it then I would let them know what your thoughts are!

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  • Reese
    Master July 2015
    Reese ·
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    Outside of dress code, they really can't tell a guest not in the wedding party what to wear. It's not even an etiquette thing, it's just completely inappropriate.

    I would suggest speaking with her and not just showing up in something else, but I would definitely not wear the uniform if that is what you prefer to do.

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  • MrsPope
    Master September 2015
    MrsPope ·
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    I agree with @ Rebecca. I would speak directly to them and express your feelings.

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  • Lara
    Master July 2015
    Lara ·
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    I would ask if she meant the ladies as well. I totally understand how you feel...guys in dress uniforms look yummy...ladies...not so much.

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  • Ally
    Master October 2016
    Ally ·
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    Nooooo, I would NOT. I know how you feel. Despite improvements in the Army's Dress Blues, I would NEVER wear mine outside what is required for a military function. To a wedding? They'd have to pay me.

    You can respectfully decline wearing your uniform, he technically cannot make you.. Plus, if you're like me, I would feel like everyone's watching me because of that. :/

    Edit: It would be different if all military made up the wedding party. but as a guest, my statement stands.

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  • mrsg
    Master September 2017
    mrsg ·
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    Thanks for your service and HECK NO you should talk to him/her and say you'd rather wear a dress.

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  • .
    Master October 2013
    .... ·
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    No, you are a guest and they cannot tell you how to dress.

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  • Mrs. Kassy
    Master June 2015
    Mrs. Kassy ·
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    What branch are you in? (Wondering about the dress colors) Maybe you could talk to your friend and compromise so you and your female military friend could wear a dress in similar colors so you would still match the male uniforms without having to wear yours.

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  • Celia Milton
    Celia Milton ·
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    I'm with the Heck No school.

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  • Tammy
    Expert September 2015
    Tammy ·
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    The members of my family, (brothers, nephews, nieces), that are military are bringing their dress uniforms to wear for pictures before the wedding. (This was something I wanted to do to add to the wedding video to honor them). However whether they want to stay in them or change clothes for the wedding/reception is up to them.

    I too would ask your friend why he wants you to wear them. If it's simply for some pictures can you change into something you'd rather wear after?

    A big THANK YOU to all the military members on here.

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  • Lennox
    Super May 2015
    Lennox ·
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    I totally understand why you wouldn't want to. Would it be a reasonable compromise to wear the uniform to the ceremony then duck out quick to get more dressed up for the reception? Might work as a compromise.

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  • Brittaney
    Expert May 2015
    Brittaney ·
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    I would ask them if it is necessary to wear the uniform. My FH is wearing his dress blue's because it is his wedding. He has military people who are in the wedding and some who are coming as guests but he is not asking them to wear their uniform. I know there are certain things you can't do while in uniform because it is disrespectful. FH will be changing from his uniform after the pictures. Also, thank you for your service.

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  • MrsE
    VIP August 2014
    MrsE ·
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    A ton of my wedding guests were in the military and I didn't even think to ask them to wear their uniforms. That's just not really appropriate. The only one in his uniform was my dad and he changed at the reception. Your friend should treat this as a military ball situation and be okay with the females wearing a dress. Good luck and thank you for your service.

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  • Mrs.Matthews
    Master January 2015
    Mrs.Matthews ·
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    Thank you ladies. I will talk to him about it, I just didn't know if that would be rude. That is a good point if I were to wear it I would have to be careful and basically not touch my husband the entire time!

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  • Harmony
    Devoted June 2015
    Harmony ·
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    I've been to several weddings where my male friends got married in their dress uniform. I didn't wear mine nor would I. My better half isnt wearing his uniform and he isnt asking our military friends to wear theirs. Again, talk to your friend and see what his motivation is.

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  • Harmony
    Devoted June 2015
    Harmony ·
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    I don't think it would be rude to question him. It's a question of your comfort.

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  • T
    Just Said Yes October 2015
    Tamara ·
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    I would speak to him and ask him if he just meant the guys, and maybe try to say something light about it, like "The guys will be looking hot, but err have you seen our uniform on the ladies!?'

    I'm sure if you speak to them about it they will come around. And if they make a big fuss about it, for no real reason, then either you suck it up, or you don't go. Surely they will come around though!

    Tamara

    www.weddingweightlossacademy.com

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  • Maggie
    VIP July 2016
    Maggie ·
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    My FH is retired military and I didn't expect him to wear his dress uniform. I have a guest coming that is retired military and he wears his dress uniform to every special occasion he can. I would tell your friend your feelings and go from there. Maybe they just assumed that everyone would want to wear their dress uniforms and didn't put much thought into it. It can't hurt to let your feeling be know. I would feel horrible as a bride if I had made someone so uncomfortable at my wedding and was never informed of it.

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  • Brigit
    Master October 2015
    Brigit ·
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    My FCIL had a friend of theirs show up in his dress blues for the ceremony and then he changed at the reception. I did happen to hear him say ( half joking) that he didn't want to but the sister of the bride said that he had to ( it was a surprise for the bride that he was there to begin with)

    Maybe you can bring something to change into for the reception?

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