Meatless Fridays Are Insane

May I suggest having your rehearsal anyway but DON'T have dinner?
May I also suggest that if both you and your FH are on team bbq that you go for it anyway and let the picky people pick apart their food (they likely won't enjoy any of your favorites anyway.)?
No matter what you choose, stay united with your FH and it'll all work out. Years from now, they'll all be talking about the memories not how uncomfortable or stressed they made you (they likely didn't even think about it).

View Quoted Comment Well. I guess those are options. But considering my fiances entire family and wedding party are Catholic, probably not the best choice to ignore that.

View Quoted Comment Well, what about a fish place? Generally, Catholics will still eat fish on Friday's during Lent (I work for a chain restaurant. Huge uptick in fish sales on Friday's from the rest of the week during Lent)?
Forgoing rehearsal dinner doesn't mean forgoing rehearsal, just to clarify. It just means you won't be paying for everyone to eat afterwards. 🤷🏾‍♀️
The wedding is about the two of you coming together. Have whatever you want (within your budget, of course). If other people don't like it or want to nit pick it, they will. You, however, don't have to listen. 🤷🏾‍♀️ I'm not going to lie, from over here, it looks like they've been trying to get under your skin about when where and why the rehearsal is to be as well as what's going to be served for dinner, when and where. None of that is fair to you. So, take a deep breath, talk over what you think your options are with your FH. He may surprise you. He may present you with an option you didn't know you had. He may tell you that the dinner part wasn't that important as long as he gets to have it with you. You'll never know if you don't talk with him, though. *hugs* You'll figure it out soon.

Giiiiirl I forgot about this. Our rehearsal will also be during lent, so we will probably have to scratch the steakhouse off of the list. Or just go and let the few Catholics eat the fish offerings. Maybe you should order pasta from the first place and pizza from the second? Or have someone else in the party order it so it's under a different name?

Could you do it a day early on a Thursday?

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"Forgoing rehearsal dinner doesn't mean forgoing rehearsal, just to clarify. It just means you won't be paying for everyone to eat afterwards. 🤷🏾‍♀️ "

Forgoing the rehearsal dinner DOES mean forgoing the rehearsal. A rehearsal dinner is a thank you for those in attendance to your rehearsal. It is very rude not to host a meal for people who took their time to participate in the rehearsal for your wedding.

I would say just to have it at a restaurant with lots of different options (like a steakhouse). That way everyone is responsible for their own meal choices and those who are Catholic will have necessary options while those who aren't can eat like normal. That is, if you have a restaurant near you that can accommodate a group of 40 (I know that would be tough around where I live). Otherwise I think pizza would be a perfectly good idea. I wouldn't worry about the pasta, maybe you could do wings (for those who aren't Catholic) and salad from a local wing restaurant?

I don’t think ordering pasta from your original place would be an issue. The woman works there, she’s not the owner, right? Regardless what personal things that are going on a person needs to do their job. Speak to the owner and explain what is going on and he’ll handle it.


If fiancé’s family gives you grief beyond that, remind them that etiquette is the grooms family are the ones traditionally suppose to pay for the rehearsal dinner. I get your frustration, growing up catholic my birthday often would fall on a Friday, which meant my birthday dinner had to be fish that the rest of my family would eat (fish sticks -yuck) or pasta (which I don’t care for).

View Quoted Comment This is a traditional belief but her party is giving her undue grief which is NOT traditional. Personally, I wouldn't be putting up with attitudes all day and then hearing a bunch of flack about the place we chose to hold the dinner at. "Don't like it, can't have it, don't eat it."

View Quoted Comment It’s not undue grief. They have dietary restrictions which SHOULD be accommodated.

View Quoted Comment It is undue grief when they want her to go out of her way to not only accommodate their dietary restrictions but also further limiting her options by telling her that they can't order from one of the obviously short list of places that fit within that range and her budget. Honey, you want to accommodate 40ppl trying to run your rehearsal& dinner, that's on you. Personally, I wouldn't. I'd pick a place that offers fish options and call it a day.

View Quoted Comment We may just order under a different name. She's beat and bit my fiance's uncle til he bled and fired from her previous employer for showing up to a factory job drunk. (She's a rare gem.) So idk that I trust her work ethic. Lol. I swear my fiance and his close family are normal.

We have the same issue as our wedding is on a Friday, but some family members will be in Eastern Orthodox lent and cannot eat any meat, including fish. We’ve asked our caterer to serve them a plated vegan meal, and we will have the regular buffet for others!

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That's insanely crazy! Totally order it under a different name!! I'm surprised she passed her background check!

View Quoted Comment I wouldn't be surprised if she tampered with the order if she recognized the name. Def a good idea to hide who the order is for.

This suggestion might be weird, but what if you do a breakfast buffet instead? Eggs, fruit, pancakes, bagels, waffles, yogurt, hasbrowns. Rehearsal Brinner! Then you can avoid the uncle's girlfriend, but still accommodate to meatless Friday.