Matron of honor?!

Not sure if I should ask my mother to be the matron of honor. My birth father died when I was very little, I’ve had a step dad and she’s had other men/husbands. I had to live with her until 18 because I didn’t have anyone else, we didn’t always get along. In fact she went behind my back to an ex and talked very poorly of me. She even once told me her (now) his a is more important then her kids.


A couple years later, she’s paid for a back to Disney World for my self, child and fiancé and is buying my dress, paying for catering and paid the deposit on the venue. She mentioned she wants to throw me a bridal shower and a bachelorette party. I don’t have many friends and those I do have, I don’t want in my bridal party because they are unreliable. My fiancé will have his dad as the best man because they are best buds. I can’t ask my sister because she wouldn’t be able to do any of the normal “maid of honor” things. She is doing so much for my wedding, well her and her husband but I can NOT for the life of me decide if I want to ask her to be my matron of honor.
She would really appreciate it and love it but like I said, we weren’t always friends. She wanted her husband to walk me down the isle and I told her no way.
Please help. What you you do in my situation? Thanks!