Maid of honor Vs Bridesmaid

I am having a similar problem. Both are bridesmaids, one cousin and my sister. They both don't get along and I really want them to work it out. My sister doesn't want me to have her cousin in the wedding because of a small petty situation they had in the past. I'm close with both of them and I don't want to kick them out. All I know is God will work things out.

I have 2 MOH tht were friends for a few years and then stopped talking like 3 years ago. They both understand that they have to suck up their unknown drama and work together. At the end, we are all grown women. For your case, I would truly be upset and just exclude both of them. Seems like they don't understand or care about how it means a lot to you that they are both in your WP. They care more about the drama they have.

Honestly, if they were giving me ultimatums and saying they wouldn't come if the other one did then I wouldn't ask either one. They obviously don't care enough about you to suck it up for one day and put their differences aside. Luckily, you have about 8 months before you have to make any decisions about your bridal party.

I skipped having friends in the BP for the same reason. I also wanted to keep it family (too often people look back at their wedding day pics n realize they don't even talk to the BP anymore).

I had two Maids of Honor and they weren't very pleased with one another so it made things a little hard for me. They REALLY pulled through as we got closer to the big day. They both had my best interest at heart and so, sometimes, they put their differences aside.

Asking either of them to be in the wedding sounds like you'll be asking for added drama and stress. If they can't figure out a way to get along for one of the most special days of your life, I wouldn't ask either of them. No competition, no drama, no problem.

If they wouldn't celebrate your big day because of something so petty maybe re-think your relationship with them.

Ridiculous...unless one has committed a crime against the other, they need to grow up. Ask them both, if that's what you want, and if they try to play eighth grade games, let them play. If their dislike of each other trumps their love for you, then you're lucky if they decline. Sorry, but you don't need your wedding to be a boxing ring for two egos who haven't yet figured out how to be adult women.

I agree with everyone else. I understand you wanting them both and trying to make it work, but if they're giving you ultimatums then they basically already decided for you. It's honestly a lose-lose situation for you -- you basically have to choose one or neither will come.

I'd make it very clear to both of them how you feel and if they can't put aside their differences for a day then they are welcome to attend as guests. You don't need this kind of stress or negativity.

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If they are willing to skip your wedding for petty reasons, maybe you should consider asking other girls or not having a bp at all. How hurtful of them :/

I wouldn't have either

They sound immature

And you don't want the added drama.

I wouldn't ask either one if they say they won't show up if the other one is there. That's childish of them to not be willing to suck it up and support you for one day.....

This is so immature. My MOH and one of my BMs had a falling out about 3 years ago and are no longer friends. They're more than happy to play nice and be civil a few times for the sake of my wedding because they're adults.

If they had pulled this ultimatum shit, I wouldn't have asked either of them.

This is ridiculous on so many levels. They both need to grow up. YOU pick whoever you want and TELL them this is who you selected. If they have a problem with it they can come as a guest or not at all. Simple!

My BFF has two BFFs, myself, and a girl I do not get along with AT ALL. I hate to say it but if these girls cannot put their issues aside on your big day to celebrate YOU, then they aren't your friends anyways and shouldn't be in your bridal party. I'd pick whichever one as MOH that can play nicer. In my friends wedding I was MOH and made sure to overly include the other BFF in all BM stuff. We planned the bachelorette weekend in Vegas together and even slept in the same hotel room that weekend. At the end of the day it was about supporting our friend and not the beef we had with each other.

They sound like amazing friends... and petty high school drama shit... so immature.

If they can't get their shit together for a day they can attend as guests and scowl at each other from opposite sides of the room.

Good luck, that sucks. As PPs have said, wait to make a decision, hopefully they'll come through for you.

Invite them both to be in your bridal party with no specific role of bridesmaid or MOH, just to stand next to you. And if one declines then that's their problem. U can't please everyone.

It kind of sucks but you all confirmed what I already kind of thought I should do =/

I appreciate everyone's thoughts on the matter