Lost a Bridesmaid

I think it would kind of depend on what happened to cause her to leave the party? I'm sorry things didn't work out. Can you salvage the situation at all?

I’ve lost a bridesmaid but that’s because I told her I no longer wanted her to be one 🤷🏻‍♀️

My wedding is considered destination, so I knew there was a possibility one of my friends wouldn't be able to afford it, so when I asked her, I said "I know money is tight, so if you can't do it, I understand: she said she would start saving and absolutely be by my side. A couple months ago (June maybe) she called me and told me she just financially couldn't swing it with plane ticket costs increasing so significantly and everything just being more expensive than it used to be. It sucks. But I just moved forward with one less girl.

View Quoted Comment I tried salvaging it but no dice. Long story short another bridesmaid was insanely rude to her and she can’t financially afford to be in the wedding.

My sister will be 8 months pregnant and lives 12 hours away. If her doctor tells her she cant come I will ask my FH sister to step in. If she doesnt want to I will just be one short 🤷‍♀️

I lost a bridesmaid, I relieved her of her duties. I was a Lil sad at first but I need everyone responsive and on board. She showed no interest at all. She says she had issues come up which I did not believe.....I didn't tell her I knew it was lies. So I just excused her from the wedding party told hope her things get better and she will still get an invite.
This is my day period. I feel good after making the decision too.

If someone dropped out for whatever reason, I would not look to "replace" the person. It's about the relationship and the honor not even numbers or any kind of "job" or party planning responsibility. I'd be supportive and not let it affect the friendship unless the reason for stepping down was personal.

Aww thats a bummer, if this is happening to you thats sad I m sorry. Things happen though I d try my best to give the person who feel like she needs to step down grace & allow myself a little bit of time to feel sad and then remind myself what a joyful time it is in my life and how grateful I am to be surrounded by love. Good luck to you!

So, the reasons for her dropping out don't really have anything to do with you specifically. If it was just the one bridesmaid being rude to her, I would try to step in and mediate between the two of them to salvage the situation. But, since she also can't afford it (which is more than understandable with the economy being what it is), I would just be a good friend to her, and tell her you are looking forward to having her as a guest at your wedding. Things don't always work out as originally planned, and that sucks, but there's no reason she can't still celebrate with you.

Just in case ...

you can rent a bridesmaid. Find Jen Glantz' website. I think in part the rented bridesmaid can take on day of ceremony tasks too.

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This.

She really only needed to pay for her dress, unless you had a destination wedding. If that's the case, then that sucks, but understandable. I wouldn't let it affect the friendship.

Edited to add, why was another BM rude to her? That sounds horrible. I'd probably drop out if that happened to me.

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Well if you felt better doing that, then I guess it worked for you. What wasn't she doing that you needed? It's really for your closest loved ones to show up on the day. I don't understand why you wouldn't just believe she had issues, since she was close enough to be in your wedding party.

I hope she comes to the wedding, but I would understand if she didn't. It hurts to be kicked out of a wedding party, I'm sure.

View Quoted Comment My best friend from elementary school. She was not responding to none of the messages she did not except the invite to my wedding group to keep in contact with all bridal party participants. Not 1 response to nothing. I don't think she was hurt at all she showed no emotion when she got removed. So now it's me and my sisters who it should have been in the beginning. If she don't attend then I really know where we stand. I will not and have not lost any sleep about it. This is my day my event. Get in line or get put out period.

Yes and I replace them because she did something bad that I can't tell on here. But it could not be forgiven so I have moved on from it

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Once you involve other people though, it's not longer just your day. Then you have to consider needs and feelings of them. If your wedding isn't for 3 more years, I'm not sure what she needed to do right now. I know it's an important day, but it is one day. It would be a shame to lose a lifelong friendship over it.

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A bridesmaid is an honor title you give to a close friend. Other than the dress, what kind of financial obligations did she think she had? If she could not afford to be in your wedding that's a completely understandable reason for dropping out.

You may have issues with the relationship moving forward if she believes you sided with your insanely rude bridesmaid or said or did nothing when the incident happened. You can be disappointed, of course but I don't think you should let any of this affect the friendship on your end.