Less than a year to plan

May 2018 would've worked if you had started planning right when you got engaged!

But honestly, even now, you can still make it happen.

I have friends who've planned their weddings in 3 months and another in 7 months.

I got engaged a couple weeks after you, started really planning in February, and I'm getting married this December.

I understand where you're coming from... however having 2 weddings in the family a month and a half apart makes me cringe already. I personally wouldn't want to add to that mess.

Maybe try looking into other later dates, perhaps a fall wedding? If you're dead set on May 21, it might be best to wait it out until 2019.

Waaaait, you want to get married on a Monday or a Tuesday?

If finances aren't a problem for you, I think you have enough time to plan for May 2018.

From what you said in your post, it sounds like your FH is more concerned that his dad and brother won't be able to make it to a May wedding because of their own wedding plans one month before and one month after.

I would need more information on why you think your FH is putting off asking them because your FFIL did not agree with your engagement.

If you don't want to wait for your FH to ask, you could always ask them yourself, but I think someone needs to compromise and it's a discussion you need to have with your FH.

I think there are a few things to consider here. First of all, don't worry about planning in less than a year! If you find the right venue, sometimes they can do alot of the planning work for you. When it comes to the family members, you need to have the discussion about how important it is for the two of you if they can make it or not. If the other wedding dates have been set, there is really not much you can do about it unfortunately. I have learned as a bride myself, even though it's my wedding day, it's not all about me. It's important for me to have those I love there and if I have to be a little more flexible because of it, I will! Years down the road, you don't want to have any regrets about how you went about it!

I think it would be frustrating that he is saying his dad and brother may not be able to make it if you chose 5/21/18, but isn't asking them, but...with the added information that this date is a Monday, your FH makes a really good point. Both his dad and brother are likely taking time off work for their own weddings, their own honeymoons, and possibly each other's weddings. Having your wedding on a Monday would require them to request even more time off, all in a span of a few months. Of course that's going to make things difficult for his family.

Why May 21st? Why not pick a date in the middle that both you and FH can be comfortable with?

Also, it's important to remember that you can't ask someone else to budge or compromise unless you are willing to do the same.

Too many weddings that are all way too close already....

Did you pick the date, because of the date, not thinking it was a weekday? Or you actually go to a venue and picked that day?

To clarify, his dad and brother are not biologically related so they aren't going to each other's weddings. Neither are taking a honeymoon until their one year anniversary. Yes, we are dead set on May 21 no matter what day of the week it is. The venue we want is open that day in both 2018 and 2019. FH and I are the only one attending his dad and brother's weddings. We want a very small wedding with our immediate family and a few close friends. We have been planning and know what colors, venue, etc we want, we just haven't gotten to book anything yet because we can't decide on a year

I also have budged on details myself. FH is colorblind and the color scheme I wanted looked entirely gray to him. He's also dead set on green. We've picked a color combo with the green he wants and moved from a beach wedding to a forest/garden wedding as well because he wanted that more. I would never ask him to drop everything he wanted to give me everything I wanted.

I don't think you'll have any problems about booking any of your vendors on a Monday or Tuesday wedding! So you could easily do 2018 if you really wanted to..

FH is the only groomsman in FFIL's wedding and the best man in his brothers. They are both paying for our hotel room and attire for him because of this. We will have very minimal expenses with travel to either of those weddings because of that.

I've also been told by my college that getting married before I graduate is my best option because changing my name on my nursing degree after I've already graduated. Waiting until 2019 will be a week after my graduation

If you already have everything planned (but not booked) then you have enough time to plan! But as someone who is personally feeling overshadowed by family in my own wedding planning, I vote to wait. You've been together 5 years already, just enjoy being engaged for now and have a wonderful wedding on your day in 2019!

You wrote, "I'm sick of waiting because he's scared of what his dad thinks (he didn't approve of our engagement). It's really upsetting for me that he cares more about whether his dad approves of our date rather than what I want."

Are you absolutely sure that his desire to delay is because he's scared of his father's opinion (because if that's the case, there's another issue you need to address). My gut reaction, to be completely honest, was too many weddings, too close together. There have to be at least a few people who will be invited to three weddings in three consecutive months, and that really is a lot.

We are the only people going to all three weddings. His dad and brother are not related at all. FH has three brothers only by his mom, all have different dads. FFIL doesn't approve because we are young and he wanted FH to not even propose to me. He's in his mid 40's and just getting married for the first time and doesn't want his son "trapped" into a life long commitment so young. All of my immediate family is fine with either date even tho they are a Monday and Tuesday, as is FMIL and FH's grandparents. The only hold back is FFIL and the oldest brother because FH hasn't asked yet

I'm planning my wedding in only 8 months. It's definitely doable. However the May 21st date is a bit close to his brother's wedding date. This might cause people to have to choose which wedding to travel or take time off for.

You can do it, just get a venue ASAP and work from there.

ETA: You sure you want to get married on a Monday?

Several of my friends have successfully planned a wedding in under a year, totally do-able. Plus it sounds like your vendors will be pretty wide open given the day(s) of the week you have on the table.

We got engaged in May but are not getting married until 2019. At first the thought of waiting so long was a bummer, but now I am basking in the long engagement. We have so much time to save, enjoy this time, and lock in vendors early (much cheaper this way). I kind of wish we were one year out right now so I can start doing fun things like dress shopping- but that time will come! In the meantime i'm going to save away and just enjoy being engaged.

We planned our whole wedding in less than 4 months, and it was fan frigging beautiful. Everyone keeps telling us how perfect it was, weeks later.

So having less than a year is no biggie

Sounds like you and FH need to talk a bit regardless about things

Definitely no to that many weddings within two months. I would want my own time, not be wedged in between two others . I also would not be getting a venue for a Monday or Tuesday wedding. Court house wedding on a Monday ? Sure ! Sorta sounds like you are trying to beat them to the alter.