Less than 1 week away from our BIG day, and I'm just wishing I planned a courthouse wedding INSTEAD of a formal ceremony!! NOBODY talks about the stress of planning and uniting people that otherwise would not be in the same setting. The disappointments and disagreements are all UNWARRANTED & completely unnecessary!! Everyone says the end result is worth it BUT months/years of planning for a 20 min ceremony.... just doesn't add up in MY world... If I had to give ANY future bride advice, SKIP the formality and use the extra time and MONEY on a honeymoon/staycation to bond with your spouse/ or renovate/create a home to share!!! THERE!!! I SAID IT :-/
First of all, I'm so sorry it sounds like you are having such a frustrating experience with wedding planning! I know it must be very disappointing. There are so many different friend/family dynamics, so everyone's planning experience is so unique. While planning for some people is a really fun experience; it can definitely be a very stressful one for others. I'm glad you shared your experience. I think it's important for couples to realize that a "big traditional wedding" isn't for everyone, and it's not always the care-free experience that's portrayed in movies and social media. Small weddings are great! Destination weddings are great! Courthouse weddings are great! I think it's important for people to consider all options before going straight to a big traditional wedding. We thought long and hard about the type of wedding we wanted. We decided that, despite having over 250 friends and family that we originally wanted to invite, we preferred to have a small, intimate affair. So we had a small destination wedding. Although we didn't save any money, it did allow our money to go much further (ie, we got a whole vacation out of it, and really got to splurge on things we wouldn't have been able to if we'd had the large wedding). Unfortunately, our officiant didn't show up (that's a whole nother story!), so our marriage there wasn't legal. So we ended up having a courthouse wedding last month, just the 2 of us. And I've gotta say - we both liked the courthouse wedding even more! It was much more intimate and romantic! ❤
You only have 1 week left until your wedding! I hope you're able to relax this week and fully enjoy your wedding day!
Aww, I'm sorry you're feeling the stress. Remind yourself that is your 20 minutes! You will make a commitment to your future spouse for life. Everyone else is invited to witness and celebrate your amazing love.
The pettiness of others should never be your concern. If need be, tell your guests you will only take questions between the hours of X and Y (keep to 1 hour). Otherwise, crickets. If they can't settle their pettiness and any travel issues, then they have adult problems. It's also a good idea to have 1 evening of zero wedding planning to focus on being together before it all.
@Cameria, thanks for opening up about how stressful this last week has been for you. I can totally relate to feeling overwhelmed with all the details and decisions 😫. This final week is really putting the pressure on, but you're almost there! Try to take a deep breath and remember why you're doing this - to celebrate your love with your soon-to-be spouse 🥰.
If you have close friends and family who can help lighten the load even a little bit, don't be afraid to ask. No one expects you to do it all alone. And definitely make sure to carve out some "you" time if you can - even just an hour to unwind with your fiancé will help boost your spirit. Wishing you all the best this last week!
Yep, I had the exact thought starting at about the month before my wedding. When I wanted to go home after work, I had to meet the photographers. When I wanted to spend a weekend relaxing, I had to call the caterers and finalize numbers. When I wanted to spend time planning my honeymoon, I had to call Aunt Susie back about why her kids weren't on the invitation and that, no, they're not invited.
But looking back, yes, I am glad I had the wedding I wanted instead of eloping. Was it "all worth it"? Debatable, it was a lot of stress, but I love the pictures I have of the day of my husband and I and our friends that we wouldn't have had if we didn't have the big wedding.
I think everyone feels the "I should've just eloped" thought the weeks before the wedding. But I do really mean it when I say once the day comes, if you go in with a "there's nothing more I can change, I'm just going to ride this day like a wave", it all works itself out.
Thanks for sharing your experience. Planning a wedding can definitely bring up stressful family dynamics. It sounds like you both have a great attitude about it though. At the end of the day, an intimate marriage is what really matters, whether that's a small destination ceremony or courthouse. Wishing you all the best for your wedding this weekend and married life going forward!